Trump Drops a Flurry of Nominees to Head FDA, OMB, CDC, and HUD
We Might Have a Problem With Trump's Labor Secretary Nominee
Trump Makes His Pick for Treasury Secretary
The Press Delivers a Fake News Trump Health Crisis, and the Bad Week...
Wisdom From the Founders: Madison and 'Gradual and Silent Encroachments'
CFPB Director Exemplifies the Worst of Washington Hypocrisy
Trump Victory: From Neocons to Americons
It’s Time to Make Healthcare Great Again
Deportation Is Necessary to Undo Harm Done at the Border
Do You Know Where the Migrant Children Are? Why States Can't Wait for...
Biden’s Union-Based Concerns Undercut U.S. Security and Jeopardize Steel Production
Joy Reid Spews Hate Toward Trump Supporters Once Again
America's National Debt Just Hit a New Record
The View Forced to Read Three Legal Notes Within Minutes of One Another...
Watch This ABC Reporter Goes on Massive Tangent Blaming Trump for Laken Riley's...
OPINION

John Boehner Follows the Yellow Brick Road

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

“So I’ve lost my credibility,” says John Boehner, as he and Senator Patty Murray (D –Wash.) go skipping down the yellow brick road. In fact, I can somehow visualize Patty Murray acting as Dorothy (The Wizard of Oz) and I can also imagine Congressmen Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) as the Tin Man, with John Boehner turning into the Cowardly Lion, and Senator Harry Reid (D-Nev.) inserting himself into the action as the Scarecrow.

Advertisement

The Cowardly Lion (Boehner) somehow believes that nobody really knows all the details of the recent budget deal reached by Dorothy (Murray) and the Tin Man (Ryan.), and therefore no one should have an opinion regarding the framework of the budget. However, on The Mark Levin Show, the Tin Man carefully laid out the program in very fine detail. Thus, perhaps the Cowardly Lion believes that nobody listens to Levin. According to the Tin Man, the flying monkeys (Democrats) are going to receive a reconfiguration of the “sequester,” which in essence means that spending will go up in the short-term. Mr. Tin Man also remarked that many of his conference members (also flying monkeys) were disturbed by the cutbacks in military spending. It seems the Republican flying monkeys have some military industrial complexes located directly in their portion of Oz, and thus they’re deeply concerned about their potential reelection to the flying monkey corps.

The monkeys promised the “sequester” would never change and that their spending cuts would be locked in stone. (Never trust a flying monkey of either political party.)

However, the Cowardly Lion and the Tin Man — truly Munchkins at heart — believe the flying monkeys will somehow keep their word this time by reducing spending in the so-called out-years. Since the Scarecrow (Reid) is the only one to have a brain, he’s convinced the others that the budget deal makes great sense. Of course, cackling all-knowingly as she looks into her crystal ball is the Wicked Witch of the West, better known as Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi. As she diplomatically directs the flying monkeys, the Wicked Witch convinces our whole cast of characters that the notion of “no place like home” is only for fools.

Advertisement

As John Boehner continues to ponder his credibility while being challenged by his alter ego, the Cowardly Lion, I can only wonder if my soliloquy would have been better served by using Popeye’s well-known character Wimpy, who once uttered the classic line, “I’ll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.”

Do you also believe that one, John Boehner?

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Recommended

Trending on Townhall Videos