John Boehner Follows the Yellow Brick Road

Posted: Dec 14, 2013 12:01 AM
John Boehner Follows the Yellow Brick Road

“So I’ve lost my credibility,” says John Boehner, as he and Senator Patty Murray (D –Wash.) go skipping down the yellow brick road. In fact, I can somehow visualize Patty Murray acting as Dorothy (The Wizard of Oz) and I can also imagine Congressmen Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) as the Tin Man, with John Boehner turning into the Cowardly Lion, and Senator Harry Reid (D-Nev.) inserting himself into the action as the Scarecrow.

The Cowardly Lion (Boehner) somehow believes that nobody really knows all the details of the recent budget deal reached by Dorothy (Murray) and the Tin Man (Ryan.), and therefore no one should have an opinion regarding the framework of the budget. However, on The Mark Levin Show, the Tin Man carefully laid out the program in very fine detail. Thus, perhaps the Cowardly Lion believes that nobody listens to Levin. According to the Tin Man, the flying monkeys (Democrats) are going to receive a reconfiguration of the “sequester,” which in essence means that spending will go up in the short-term. Mr. Tin Man also remarked that many of his conference members (also flying monkeys) were disturbed by the cutbacks in military spending. It seems the Republican flying monkeys have some military industrial complexes located directly in their portion of Oz, and thus they’re deeply concerned about their potential reelection to the flying monkey corps.

The monkeys promised the “sequester” would never change and that their spending cuts would be locked in stone. (Never trust a flying monkey of either political party.)

However, the Cowardly Lion and the Tin Man — truly Munchkins at heart — believe the flying monkeys will somehow keep their word this time by reducing spending in the so-called out-years. Since the Scarecrow (Reid) is the only one to have a brain, he’s convinced the others that the budget deal makes great sense. Of course, cackling all-knowingly as she looks into her crystal ball is the Wicked Witch of the West, better known as Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi. As she diplomatically directs the flying monkeys, the Wicked Witch convinces our whole cast of characters that the notion of “no place like home” is only for fools.

As John Boehner continues to ponder his credibility while being challenged by his alter ego, the Cowardly Lion, I can only wonder if my soliloquy would have been better served by using Popeye’s well-known character Wimpy, who once uttered the classic line, “I’ll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.”

Do you also believe that one, John Boehner?