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Look Who's Messin' With Texas Now!

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of
Hey Texas – left-wing America has got it out for you...
Now that Governor Rick Perry has catapulted to “front runner” status and is posing a credible threat to President Obama’s re-election, your entire state is under the microscope. Team “O” and their accomplices in the media have already begun to discredit Rick Perry any way they can, which means that you, Texas, are caught in the crossfire.
The goal is to define Rick Perry as a really, really horrible person and a terrible elected official, for the millions of Americans who don’t yet know about him.  And some will probably try to characterize the people of Texas as “victims” of Perry, as he is America’s longest continuously serving U.S. Governor.
But let’s be honest Texas - you have collectively re-elected this man over and over to be your Governor. You have enabled the great mistake that is Rick Perry - or so the narrative in the media will go.
So let’s get prepared for some of the “themes” with which you will be attacked, Texas.  And here’s theme number one:  Texas has repeatedly elected a “stupid” Governor.
Governor Perry’s “stupid status” was implied in a recent report from CBSNews.Com (you know, that “objective” “journalistic” enterprise that as of last Thursday was selling Obama re-election merchandise in their online store).  The report detailed a campaign event in New Hampshire, where Perry was asked what he thinks of the theory of evolution by a young boy in the audience, and the Governor noted that it is a theory with “gaps in it.” 
Truthfully, the world of academia has in the last couple of decades produced legitimate alternative theories about the origins of the earth – “theistic evolution,” “creation science,” and so forth – but such theories open one up to the possibility of the existence of a God, and left-wing America will NOT allow their atheistic assumptions to be challenged.  Thus, Governor Perry was just being his stupid, un-enlightened self when he refused to “bow to Darwin”– and obviously, Texas, no reasonable person would want him to be President.
And how about this, Texas:  your Governor is obviously stupid because he only has a Bachelor’s Degree from Texas A&M.  I mean, think about it:  if you’d just elect somebody who was, say, an Ivy League law school graduate, you could have a Governor who advances enlightened ideas like state-controlled healthcare (thank you Governor Deval Patrick of Massachusetts, a Harvard Law School grad), and mandatory “LGBT education” for K-12 students (thank you Governor Jerry Brown of California, a Yale Law School Grad).
But no, Texas, your Governor only has a Bachelor’s Degree in Animal Science, and worse yet – he didn’t earn very good grades as a student.  Never mind the fact that we know more about Rick Perry’s “grades” than we do about Barack Obama’s – your Governor is just “stupid,” and the opposition will continue to reiterate that theme.
And here’s theme number two:  Rick Perry and his fellow Texans are “thieves.”  Why?  Because Texas has been “stealing jobs” from other states!
You think I’m joking? Governor Perry has literally been so accused in  publications like the San Francisco Chronicle, and Politico.Com.  Worse yet, Rick Perry has actually been publicly aggressive about recruiting businesses to his state, and has even (gasp!) boasted that Texas provides an economic and regulatory environment that’s better for businesses than that of other states.
I’m sure that makes sense to you, Texas – your Governor wants the best for you, and he doesn’t mind saying that what his state offers to the outsider is something superior.  But in the prevailing mindset of left-wing America, being competitive and achieving economic success is the gravest of offenses.
President Barack Obama has been quite clear with his disdain for competitiveness and achievement.  When he was running for the presidency in 2008, he noted that he wanted to “spread the wealth around” – that is, he didn’t say he wanted to enable the creation of more wealth, but rather, he merely wanted to re-distribute wealth out of some people’s bank accounts, and into the accounts of certain other people.
Since becoming our President, Mr. Obama has noted that he believes in “American exceptionalism” in the same way that foreign heads of state believe in the “exceptionalism” of their countries – which is a clever way of saying that he doesn’t really believe that any one country should be regarded as being better than any other.  Compare Obama’s high-mindedness to the attitudes of Governor Perry, and, well Texas, you see how offensive your “pro-Texas” Governor really is.
And here’s a third theme:  Governor Rick Perry oversees a destructive public education system that doesn’t “invest” (read “spend”) enough money, and doesn’t comply with the federal “No Child Left Behind” law. In truth, left-wing America has been trying to leave “No Child Left Behind” behind for years.  But now – alas! – NCLB has a valid purpose:  it can be used to smear Rick Perry.
Hold on tight, Texas.

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