This year, like no other, has forced me to think about what truly matters: my faith, my family, my friends, and my frailty.
Nothing reminds you of your mortality like a cancer diagnosis. Back in January, days before I traveled to Liberty University to speak to over 15,000 students about how every human life has a God-given purpose, I was faced with questioning if my own purpose had run its course.
I’m a husband and a father. My beautiful wife, Bethany, and my four kiddos are my motivation and inspiration. My first tears, as I read the results of my completely unexpected diagnosis, were for each of them. Indeed, God had more for me. I was too young (admittedly younger in my mind than in reality). I’m not alone in this all-too-common struggle among men.
Each year, 299,010 men find out they have prostate cancer in the United States. The National Cancer Institute reports that 13% of men will receive a prostate cancer diagnosis in their lifetime. To compare, there are 42,780 deaths estimated for breast cancer in 2024. There are 35,250 estimated deaths from prostate cancer this year. I praise God that I wasn’t one of those tragic statistics.
This form of cancer is very treatable, depending on the stage. I was Stage 2 with an asterisk. I had a higher risk because lab results showed multiple instances of probable perineurial invasion. That refers to the likelihood the cancer spreads outside of the tumor.
Life is precious—every moment of it. Throughout my life, I’ve had friends who’ve battled cancer. I’ve witnessed years-long battles and even sudden month-long fighting that ended in tragedy. No one ever wants that to be part of their story. We often can’t imagine someone else’s battle becoming our own.
This is why my faith has been my rock. I always need the Lord. And I needed Him more than ever when the C-word crept into my storyline. My wife, Bethany, and I have journeyed through this unwanted redirection in life together. She never stopped speaking hope and healing into my situation. Husbands, if you haven’t told your wife how much your heart needs her, please stop what you’re doing and tell her now. God created us to depend on one another. From the start, he knew it was not good for us to be alone (Gen 2:18).
One of the most beautiful things that happened during my struggle was the expression of compassion from everywhere – from family, friends, church, the workplace, and even from complete strangers. I can’t tell you how often I sat weeping, reading messages from people I’ve never met who spoke life into my situation.
Our humanity shines in adversity. We’re more loving, more patient, more gracious. We’re kinder. And heaven knows we all need that.
I know this year has been fraught with the corrosiveness of politics. We’ve been conditioned during the election cycle to distrust, demonize, and dehumanize each other. It’s kind of our nature as human beings to become tribal. It starts at the earliest of ages when we’re pitted against one another in competition in school, sports, workplace, and life. Yet, there’s something so beautiful about the division-busting unity that happens when someone faces hardship. Even some people who strongly dislike my worldview reached out to me to show care and concern.
I had an incredible support system, but I know not everyone has that when facing the painful and unexpected. Someone out there needs that word of encouragement, that knowing they matter, and that prayer that transforms their fear into faith.
In May, I had surgery to remove the cancer. My summer schedule was mainly cleared as I didn’t know how my recovery would go. It was not easy. I had some really rough days, but I progressed through the pain. What could have been devastation turned into motivation for me to want to do better for myself, my family, and the ministry my wife and I have devoted ourselves to – The Radiance Foundation.
It was a hard reset to fight through, but I’m so much better for it. I’ve lost forty pounds and had no business carrying on my tired body. Who knew sleep, a better diet, and regular exercise were healthy for you? My wife and I enjoy our time together on our long walks. I’ve returned to my busy schedule with my kiddos (they’re awesome athletes, and they excel in their homeschool studies). And I’ve resumed traveling, speaking, writing, designing, and agitating as I fulfill my God-given purpose. I’m a activist who loves to create stuff that’s fearless, factual, and freeing.
Following my treatment, I have to be tested every three months to determine if there is any recurrence of cancer. This week, I received the results of my second 3-month Prostate-Specific Antigen (PSA) blood test. And I thank God for the result.
I. Am. Cancer-Free!
So, this Thanksgiving holiday, may we take the time to slow down and just take inventory of the good in our lives. May we stop and recognize the people or things we may have taken for granted. May we think about how we can seize new opportunities to be a blessing to those around us, in sickness or in health.
I know I will have a hard time sitting at the table this weekend and not ugly-crying as I look at my wife, my daughters, and my sons. They’re the reason I will do whatever it takes to stay healthy so I can love them for years and years to come. I’m beyond thankful for my life, for the God who gave (and gives) me life, and for the incredible people in my life. I pray you feel the same way.
Happy Thanksgiving!