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Good News: Liberals Say I'm the Ultimate Tool!

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of

Kathleen396 wrote: These talk show hosts and those libertarians who write for Townhall are the socialist democrats best friend, they helped get Obama re-elected by being anti-anything GOP. If you voted for Gary Johnson, if you stayed home, you own this mess. -Obama Gives GOP a Bailout


Dear Kathleen,

In elections the only one responsible for the outcome is the candidate. Romney had every chance to win and he didn’t. His bad, not Gary Johnson’s.

Unfortunately the GOP has too often put forward candidates that advocate the very policies that they criticize their opponent for.

Asking Americans to vote Romney because he is more patriotic than Obama almost worked; it’s kind of a relief that it didn’t.

Romney would have been a fine president. He just would have advocated many of the same policies that got us into fiscal difficulties.

The country needs a revolutionary Republican, not an evolutionary one.        

Ericynot wrote: The other problem is that Romney was the most disingenuous candidate I've seen in 42 years of presidential voting. I simply can't in good conscience vote for a guy who will say anything and change any position to try to grab a few votes. It's not so much about party, or even philosophy, as it is about integrity. -Obama Gives GOP a Bailout

Dear Comrade Eric,

They’re all disingenuous, including your friend Comrade Obama.

He calls for a balanced budget, yet spends more than he brings in. Or how about that time he railed against lifting the debt ceiling when he was a senator? That was really funny.

Or remember that time that Obama deported all those illegal aliens to pander to the law and order crowd? And when that didn’t work, he went back to pandering to Latinos?

Or how about when he declared war on Libya? Yeah. That was constitutional.


Or, as Megyn Kelly noted this week, it was really a big surprise when Obama nominated another white guy to fill a cabinet position.

Most disingenuous might describe a guy who wants us all to believe he’s a genius even though he won’t even release his college transcripts.        

PhillupSpace2 wrote: Occasionally someone surpasses their own best efforts and should be recognized. Anderson 659 posted on an earlier Ransom column a truly outstanding example of excellence in communication. I hope he approves of my highlighting it here.

U.S. Tax revenue: $2,170,000,000,000

* Fed budget: $3,820,000,000,000

* New debt: $ 1,650,000,000,000

* National debt: $14,271,000,000,000

* Recent budget cuts: $ 38,500,000,000

Let's now remove 8 zeros and pretend it's a household budget:

* Annual family income: $21,700

* Money the family spent: $38,200

* New debt on the credit card: $16,500

* Outstanding balance on the credit card: $142,710

* Total budget cuts: $385

Get the picture yet?

-24 Million Martyrs

Dear Phillip,

Bravo. Thanks for highlighting some common sense

hmiller wrote: The just ended Congress was by far the worst mess we've had since such matters began to be recorded. Obstructionism was at an all time high - another new Republican record for fillibustering. Including several pieces of legislation to get recovery from the Republican record recession moving forward. Don't forget the GOP controlled both houses of Congress from Jan '95 to Jan 2007. The last 6 years of that 12 year control also had a Republican in the White House. -24 Million Martyrs


Dear Comrade Miller,

No way. You’re hysterical.

Just because Ezra Klein’s mad because they passed fewer laws than any other congress, doesn’t make it the worst ever.

And don’t tell me that it’s the most partisan ever either.

Can liberals do me- and themselves- a favor and read a history book?

The congresses that debated slavery were far more polarized than congress today. They were responsible for the Fugitive Slave Act and the Kansas-Nebraska Act, both of which stand as stains on our history. You can’t find worse congresses than those two.  

How about the congress that passed the Gulf of Tonkin Resolution? How about the congress that passed the income tax? 

The economy usually doesn’t require congressional action to get it moving again.

The sad fact that it seems we need congressional action to help us get out of bed and fully dressed in the morning is proof that we’ve had much worse congresses that have brought us to this fix to begin with.       

MikeDala wrote: John, once again you show why you shouldn't give up your day job. At least you got this one half right. Christie would be a horrible choice for 2016 after his bromsnce with Obama. Christie might as well change to being a member of the Democratic Party. As for Mitt Romney, he was the only candidate that had any chance of defeating Obama. And Romney almost pulled it off. He lost by a narrow margin in 4 states. - Chris Christie is not Governor of the United States

Dear Comrade Mike,

Romney lost.


The margin doesn’t matter. Obama is the worst president in the history of our country, and Romney should have trounced him.

I don’t know what your day job is, but calm down, I’m not giving mine up. I’m actually picking up another day job. 

In addition to writing a daily column and running the website Townhall Finance, I also have a syndicated, daily radio show that airs Monday-Friday 2PM-3PM ET.

You can click here to find local stations or to listen online while you work your day job- which, I think we both agree, you shouldn’t quit.    

XJNYC2013 wrote: As I said Ransom is the Ultimate Tool. Uneducated, ignorant and smarmy - hates what he knows nothing about. Oh and by the way -- calling it "Joisey" a 1930's gag writer's idea of how people speak is the equivalent of calling San Francisco "Frisco" it just demonstrates your own stupidity. - Chris Christie is not Governor of the United States

Dear Comrade X,

I thought the Ultimate Tool would be some kind of a combined lawn mower blade sharpener with an attached vegetable juicer that can also be used as: 1) a baby-butt soft car chamois or 2) a pocket fishing reel.

Alas, we are both wrong Comrade X.

The Ultimate Tool seems to be this tool trailer… although be careful: While it promises to be “an organized approach to home building and finish carpentry,” one person pointed out that you must “check with your? vehicle’s insurance or business insurance about trailer insurance” before towing.

Or it could be this purple case of something-or-another called the Ultimate Tool, which also bills itself as the The Ultimate Crafter's Companion. If it seems confusing to you, then you’re not alone.


That said, the purple something-or-another  bills itself as an “all-in-one, compact carry-case which allows you to score, measure, trim, emboss and embellish; create boxes, shaped card blanks, envelopes and so much more.”

Want more could you want?

So, please be careful in the future about bestowing upon me unearned honorifics that should rightly go to more ingenious and more versatile tools. I don’t even have an ergonomic handle... as far as you know.           

DagNabbit wrote: Wow. This could possibly be the most boneheaded column in the history of that repository of boneheaded columns, Townhall. Mental health screening for gun purchasers is gun control? Sounds like crazy control, actually, and apparently you squeaked by. New Jersey rocks, BTW. I'm a New Yorker, but Jersey beaches are some of the best, and western and southern NJ really ARE the Garden State. But I can see where it would be a little too rough and tumble for a dough boy like Ransom. - Chris Christie is not Governor of the United States

Dear Comrade Dag,

I’m more the Florida beaches kind of guy. Or the Bahamas. Or even Rehoboth Beach, Delaware.

I’m sure Jersey has very nice beaches for Jersey or even for New York. But really who cares?

It’s not about beaches, as you know.

It’s about whether I want my country to resemble New Jersey.

I’ll say it once more: I don’t. Quit crying about it.  

The tax system alone, with both a state sales tax and an income tax, is horrid.


It elected Jon Corzine. Explain that stain away.       

hmiller wrote: DDddduuuhhhhh what are conservative values? Where are they listed? The old South was very conservative - that must be what you mean. Saudi-Arabia and the entire Middle East are very conservative - EXCEPT very liberal Israel. All of our founders supported liberalism, to some degree. After the Revolution confiscation and extradition were applied to the Conservatives - that must be the bunch you refer to! Where are conservative values being used to run a Country? - Chris Christie is not Governor of the United States

Dear Comrade Miller,

You made it twice. Congrats. It’s hard to do.

The founders believed in Classical Liberalism. It can best be described as the belief in the natural liberty of man, where rights are derived from nature, not the state. It includes the right to property in addition to the right to make social choices free from coercion.

Conservatives ideals essentially have ruled America until recently.

The Revolutionary War was fought to “conserve” those values of self-government that the first settlers of America enjoyed.

The founders, for the most part, in their support of Classical Liberalism were conservative even if their action were often radical.  

Again, liberals would do well to read books more often.

Reading from a teleprompter doesn’t count.         

Joe wrote: Your blog on Governor Christie and the State of New Jersey was despicable. I am one person who will never read your columns again. You are insulting and rude.



PFK wrote: I don't like Christie either but now I don't like you either after saying those awful things about New Jersey; a great State. What awful things you have said. You should be fired from your job.


KA wrote: I sorry about you negative feelings about the Republican Party.... But we are here to stay. Your venum will be you own doom.

-  Chris Christie is not Governor of the United States

Dear Comrades All,

I feel so pitiful for not wanting the United States to resemble: 1) Newark and; 2) an episode from the Jersey Shore.

So please accept my apologies by watching this educational video titled “It’s a Jersey Thing” that might come directly from the New Jersey Convention and Visitors Bureau- but doesn’t.


That’s it for this week.



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