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OPINION

My Fishy Letter of Encouragement for the Town Hall Rebels

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.
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Isn’t it funny that the liberals, who have historically encouraged the contrarian, are now crying foul since conservatives, libertarians and non-Obama addled Democrats have decided, en masse, to become the contrarians and shout Obama, his policies, and his step-n-fetch gofers down?

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As you know by now, the Obamanoid’s town hall sale of Obamacare ain’t going that well for Dems because thinking, unbeholden people aren’t buying Barack’s crack. So, what did the White House do in light of the GP’s legitimate concerns over Barack’s proposed legislation? Did they go back and flush it down the crapper? No. Did Obama bend one of his big ears to our bigger concerns? Yeah, right.

No, the White House, in the spirit of tolerance, hope and change officially dispatched some pursed-lip chick to video warn the serfs of Obamaland that if we disagree with His Highness’ health scare bill in a “fishy” email or casual conversation then the White House wants to know about it—and we could very well be deep weeds.

What is this, Russia? Did I wake up in Venezuela? Is this an Austin Powers flick, or a joke? If it isn’t, I’m screwed; all I have been doing for the past umpteen weeks is . . . uh . . . disagreeing with B-HO on my show.

Yep, ever since the Socialist-in-Chief floated his government-bloating, freedom-strangulating 1,100 page unread health care stool I have been smacking it like Rosie would a piñata full of Twinkies; therefore, I might as well just go public with my home address since I’m probably already “flagged”: It’s 1313 Kiss-My-Skinny-Backside Blvd, in Light-a-Fart, Florida, and my email is doug@youaretrulypathetic.com.

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Someone help me here. Aren’t the liberals the ones who spawned the likes of Bill Ayers, Bernadine Dohrn, Bruce Franklin, Jose Angel Gutierrez, Tom Hayden, Angela Davis, Ron Karenga, Jane Fonda and Orville Schell—rabble rousers extraordinaire? (Some of these dogs were violent, I might add.) Therefore, you of all people, Ms. Lefty, should understand and appreciate revolt and revolutionaries, eh? But alas, you don’t—or won’t.

What’s the matter, little liberal? Are you guys the only ones who get to play James Dean? Is that it? Can we not wear the leather jacket? Can we not ride a Harley? Can we not sing “We’re Not Gonna Take It?” Can we not be the rebel with a cause? Is our party disallowed our Rosa Parks? We are? Well, isn’t that conveeeeeeeeeeeeenient?

Liberal politicians, pundits and Obama’s Whine House are condemning outrage over dissent for Obamacare? Unbelievable. Isn’t that what one would call “the putz calling the kettle black?” How the heck do you hacks think you got into the White House in the first place? How did you arrive at that place of power where you could, possibly irrevocably, dismantle our nation? I’ll tell you how: It was by being dissident, getting vocal, organizing, going viral . . . and abracadabra, poof, you socialists won. I believe it was Obama himself who said one should sharpen one’s elbows and get in people’s faces. Yep, I’m pretty sure it was.

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Well, guess what? What’s good for the commie goose is good for the conservative gander. Seeing that in a few short months you have not only failed to bring about your promised Hope and Change but have instead increased our debts and deficits, weakened our national security, turned traditional values on their head, scarfed down a big chunk of the private sector, attempted to lasso our cherished liberties, and intend to turn our health care into a DMV with stethoscopes, we officially want our &%$# nation back. And you know what? We’re not too proud to tear a page out of your playbook and move from being nice to being heard. Yep, the times they are a changin’.

Today, if you want to play the rebel (and who doesn’t?), “The Man” is Obama and “The Machine” is his socialist agenda fueled by a Chicago-based bouillabaisse of nefarious critters adept at conformity and bullying. There’s your oppressor, rebel. I think it’s cool that stacks of everyday Americans, especially the cute little old ladies (without being bused in or wearing some red T-shirt with a nut on it) are a part of this political revolt.

B-HO and his boys underestimated the intelligence and malleability of Maw and Paw Kettle to his catastrophic reform and his scare tactics; that crap might have worked in Chi-town, but it will not fly with the rest of us.

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Finally, to the rebels who like limited government versus this Orwellian rat cage Obama’s trying to strap on your head, I say: Have fun with your push for true hope and change. I know these are serious times, but time and truth are on your side, yes they are.

No matter how much Pelosi and Boxer ridicule you, you must carry on. When the Whine House threatens to log your IP addresses and snatch your emails, you must plow ahead. When they show up with union goons and Acorn asses, let that encourage you because that means you’re officially under their skin, and the tide is about to turn. Finally, my well-dressed and informed dissenters, let their derision fuel your passion, and let their frowns bring you joy, as this could be our finest hour.

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