Tipsheet

Who Would The Office Support in PA Primary?

Creed.jpg picture by MattLewis01

With all this talk about Scranton, I think The Office missed a golden opportunity to have a "very special" episode where the election is tearing the office apart.

Here's how it starts:  Michael assumes Stanely is supporting Obama, and asks him where to get one of those signs ...

So how would the characters break-down on the Hillary/Obama split?  Here are my thoughts ...

Michael -- "I'm waiting for the last minute.  I get in the booth, close my eyes, and think of my heroes:  Martin Luther King, Ben Franklin, Elvis Costello..."

Dwight - "I'm a big Hillary supporter.  Why?  Three words:  Hardworking, Alpha-Male, jackhammer, mercilous, insatiable."

Pam - "I just think Obama seems nice.  Really."

Jim - "I'm supporting McCain.  So I guess I'll vote Hillary.   Don't tell Pam."

Creed - "I partied with Bill and Hillary at Woodstock.  She scares the hell out of me. Still, who am I voting for?  Two words:  Operation Chaos."

Stanley - "Michael thinks because I'm black, that I like Obama.  What he doesn't know is, I voted for Pat Buchanan ... again!"

Kevin the Intern - "Obama's all about technology.  I mean, Hillary wouldn't know a blog if it hit her in the head."

Angela - "I support whoever treats cats the best.  I've always admired Socks.  So yeah, I suppose I'll vote for Hillary."

Jan - "I know first-hand what it's like to be in a relationship with a complete moron.  Who wears the pant-suit in my family?  So I guess you know who I'm supporting..."

Kelly - "Obama.  I mean, Brad and Angelina are both supporting him, so he's obviously the best choice."

Update:  Fonzie Chimes in with some corrections:

Dwight would vote for either himself or some weird third party candidate with a plan to turn beets into gas.   

Creed would say he can’t vote because of some conviction in the early 70s. 

Kevin is the fat guy, not an intern.  You mean Ryan.