OPINION

Cancel Culture Commands: 'Let Them Eat Fake'

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Townhall.com.

Editor's Note: This column is co-authored by Loyd Pettegrew

Nancy Pelosi is America’s modern-day Marie Antoinette, legislating to please less than half of America, most of whom are members or followers of the Bourgeoisie. Their predisposition toward conservatives generously is, “Let them eat cake.”

One of our universal truths is: before you can create a fake, you must first have the real version. It is a simple concept that begs the question: is it possible to cancel something real or true and replace it with fake or false and then elevate the imposter lie or forgery to reality for millions of people? Unless are you Rip Van Winkle and have been shipwrecked on a desert island or are just waking (woking) up from a 20-year coma, you know the answer. Fake is in, real is out and your opinion doesn’t count if you disagree. As Victor Davis Hanson observes, “No society can long exist if it believes that its founding principles, its customs and traditions, its very origins are evil and must be erased.”

Fake is actually a lie and has likely been around since the being of human interaction. Think about all the things that are popularized impersonations. Margarine is fake butter, whipped vegetable oil in a tub is fake whipped cream, perfect fingernails are likely glued on, hairpieces and wigs abound, counterfeit designer purses are sold on street corners, silicone is implanted, fillers and Botox-injected and cosmetics are used to hide or enhance one’s real appearance. Our culture has drunk the sugar-free Kool-Aid and has unavoidably become customers and purveyors of the fake.

President Trump declared that Fake News controlled the news cycle, and he was rightfully outraged. The irony of the Washington Post’s 2017 addition to its masthead, “Democracy Dies in Darkness” has been lost on journalism professors and mainstream media news editors. This may have been the first time a modern profession was continually called out for conspiring to systemically lie for political reasons (discounting opposing political parties). Trump pounded that narrative home to the chagrin of the entire mainstream media establishment and he suffered deeply for having done so. Do you remember being warned by your parents that just because you read something in print doesn’t make it true?

Fake stories take on life starting as Tweets, Instagram posts or Facebook fantasies while the truth is canceled or relegated to a subservient position that requires you search for it, provided the Big Tech oligarchs haven’t removed it.

Under the reign of wokedomn, the once straightforward concept of equity is now voiding two gender sports, restrooms, competitions and photo IDs as testosterone advantaged biologic XY genotypic individuals who identify as XX are encouraged to invade sporting events and bathrooms. Gender dysphoria is just one unfortunate component of the woke derangement. As long as a body is enhanced with an anabolic advantage, declaring yourself a fake female is a physiologic illusion. Athletes who competed under the influence of anabolic steroids, whether they be an XY male looking to increase their strength, endurance and power, or XX females looking to do the same or unaware they were receiving these drugs (Russian Olympic Athletes), all held or still hold fake athletic records. These performance-enhancing drugs have been outlawed from competitions because they cancel honest efforts by athletes who don’t cheat. Cancel culture now insists natural steroid hormonal enhancement is not a disqualification to compete against a non-gender dysphoric individual. If physical games are now to be subjugated to these woke mind games, then excellence in athleticism will need asterisks to note how an individual faked a win or suffer the Trumpian indignity of being fake news. 

Vegetarians are now able to eat reconstructed soybeans, jackfruit and other plant-based protein and fiber as fake beef. It looks, tastes and chews like beef and the only methane released into the environment will be from woke consumers. This allows carnivores to fake social concern about alleged global warming concerns brought about by rampant ruminants belching enough methane to power a major metropolis. 

Billionaire Bill Gates, the world’s perpetual scold and do-gooder by his singular standards, wants to save the planet by replacing ruminant sourced animal protein with fake beef and is buying up vast tracts of farmland, making him the largest private agricultural landholder in the country. As of January 2021, he owned 242,000 acres or the equivalent of approximately 380 square miles of America’s prime farmland. If beef is busted, not only will hamburgers, roasts and steaks become rare or fake, but all the byproducts of cattle-culture will become rare and more expensive. Many mistakenly think that when a beef animal is processed, the result is only found in the meat case at their local Kroger’s. In reality, nothing is wasted when an animal is processed, except the methane that perpetually runs AOC’s mouth off. Skin becomes leather for shoes, wallets, designer purses, coats and car seats; blood becomes food or fertilizer for plants; endocrine tissue like thyroid, pancreas and pituitary glands become pharmaceuticals; bone becomes soil-enhancing phosphate fertilizer; fat is rendered into soaps; ears, hooves snouts, tails and penises become chew toys for dogs. Literally, nothing is recycled. Cancel the beef industry and you sacrifice myriad necessary byproducts that make our lives better. 

Starting on college campuses in the 60s, us squares were popularly admonished to “get real.In other words, to be true, genuine, not a fake. Those who called for their generation to get real now dominate college campuses, tenured professors who teach liberal left-leaning politics and revisionist history, news editors, woke professional politicians (a shameful oxymoron) and Big Tech oligarchs, or as Kurt Schlichter refers to them – “our betters." The reality is they are all now turning their backs on the real and embracing the fake. Neither of us are licensed psychiatrists but our doctoral education and experience lead us to believe they have reality dysphoria and will soon earn their own asterisk about being helpful…for wanton injuriousness.