Tipsheet

Jebediah Springfield for President?

This whole Rudy Giuliani marrying his second cousin story has reminded me of the Simpsons episode where they reveal how Springfield and Shelbyville became two distinct cities:

Jebediah Springfield: People, our search is over! On this site we shall build a new town where we can worship freely, govern justly, and grow vast fields of hemp for making rope and blankets.
Shelb.: Yes, and marry our cousins.
Jebediah: I was -- what are you talking about, Shelbyville? Why would we want to marry our cousins?
Shelb.: Because they're so attractive. I, I thought that was the whole point of this journey.
Jebediah: Absolutely not!
Shelb.: I tell you, I won't live in a town that robs men of the right to marry their cousins.
Jebediah: Well, then, we'll form our own town. Who will come and live a life devoted to chastity, abstinence, and a flavorless mush I call rootmarm?
[the people divide between Jebediah and Shelbyville]