Tipsheet

Life Lessons With Donald: If You Want to Feel Successful, 'Always Be Around Unsuccessful People'


Interested in Trump's keys to success, but unable to afford Trump University? Well, gather 'round kids, and watch the master at work. Trump fans will say he's joking here, of course, which may in fact be true. But he's joking about them. Enjoy:


Ah yes, the reliable "bring your ugly friend to the bar to seem more attractive by comparison" trick. Works like a charm. What a morale boost this little chestnut must be for Trump's campaign team, which he routinely informs voters is comprised of the -- ahem -- very best and brightest.  And what a confidence-inspiring window it may offer into how he might go about assembling a presidential cabinet in the extremely unlikely event that he should win. Sure, they may be a bunch of incompetents, but at least I'll have the most exciting stories at the dinner table!  In fairness, Trump indisputably is an expert in being the center of attention; now we know one of his special little shortcuts. What strikes me most about this clip is how it falls into a pattern of Trump occasionally needling and trolling his staunchest followers and supporters. Sometimes the Alpha Dog feels compelled to remind the lessers around him of their station in life. Lookin' at you, Chris Christie. "I love the poorly educated" comes to mind, but given the context there, I think that was less of a "haha, you're a bunch of dumdums" admission, and more of an awkward attempt to express appreciation for the varied demographic groups who supported him in the Nevada caucuses.  More applicable is this jewel of a quote about "my people:"


I remember writing and tweeting this riff at the time, marveling how Trump had flat-out admitted that he could murder someone in broad daylight and his hardcore supporters wouldn't bat an eye.  He didn't say 'murder,' you liar, his twitter hordes responded.  And then he did say murder.  And right on cue, they eagerly applauded.  This is how a cult operates.  And Trump -- who may be ignorant on many issues, but is far smarter than many within his following -- knows it.  And he wants others to know it, too, hence the dig.  He gets an ego boost from the slavish devotion he engenders and he gets an ego boost from telegraphing that he thinks a lot of "his people" are kind of nuts.  But they're nuts for him, and that's all that matters.  Don't worry, he'll throw in a few lines about how smart they are, and how much he loves them, so they won't catch on.  But even if they did catch on, it wouldn't make any difference.  After all, he could shoot someone, etc, etc.  So there you have it:  If you want to feel important, surround yourself with "unsuccessful people."  That approach to life may horribly stunt the development of your intellect and character, but it'll feel great.  You might even develop some fun delusions of grandeur along the way -- at which point, you can run around doing and saying anything you want, and your carefully-selected echo chamber of the dimwitted and unimpressive will sing hallelujahs at every step.  Assuming you have a lot of money and fame, that is.  If not, then maybe you're best reserved for a let's say, a "supporting role."  I'll leave you with the personal account of one woman who managed to escape:

Almost a year ago, recruited for my public relations and public policy expertise, I sat in Trump Tower being told that the goal was to get The Donald to poll in double digits and come in second in delegate count. That was it...My support for Trump began probably like yours did. Similar to so many other Americans, I was tired of the rhetoric in Washington. Negativity and stubbornness were at an all-time high, and the presidential prospects didn't look promising. In 2015, I fell in love with the idea of the protest candidate who was not bought by corporations. A man who sat in a Manhattan high-rise he had built, making waves as a straight talker with a business background, full of successes and failures, who wanted America to return to greatness. I was sold. Last summer, I signed on as the Communications Director of the Make America Great Again Super PAC...

Trump never intended to be the candidate. But his pride is too out of control to stop him now You can give Trump the biggest gift possible if you are a Trump supporter: stop supporting him. He doesn't want the White House. He just wants to be able to say that he could have run the White House. He’s achieved that already and then some. If there is any question, take it from someone who was recruited to help the candidate succeed, and initially very much wanted him to do so. The hard truth is: Trump only cares about Trump. And if you are one of the disaffected voters — one of the silent majority like me — who wanted a candidate who could be your voice, I want to speak directly to you as one of his biggest advocates and supporters. He is not that voice. He is not your voice. He is only Trump's voice.

Now, before you follow the knee-jerk playbook and angrily attack me over this post, dear Trump followers, please consider that these are Trump's words about you, not mine.  Maybe -- just maybe -- when he says how much he loves you, he doesn't actually mean it.