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Ezra Klein and the High Priests Channel Obama the Divine

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of

Obama no longer has a press operation.

Instead he holds high mass. On attendance are a bunch of progressive divines and shamans. They peer into the tea leaves or the scattered entrails of the sacrificial special interests du jour that the president has spread out for the jackals to eat.

The liberal high priests are then necessary to interpret for the rest of us what the tea leaves and smeared guts actually mean.

Apparently, we have reached the point where we can’t actually have the Word of the Messiah without the high priests interposing on our behalf.

The latest case of divination comes courtesy of the Congressional Budget Office’s analysis of Obama’s budget-that-shall-not-be-passed Version: 2013.

Last week the CBO admitted that, yes, what we all knew all along is really true.

The reason why Obama hasn’t been able to muster a single vote in two years on a budget, even from within his own party- yet alone pass an actual budget while president- is that his budget proposals, if passed, would do more harm than good.

“The nonpartisan Congressional Budget Office said Friday that President Obama’s 2013 budget will hurt the economy in the long term,” reported the Hill on April 20th, “arguing the larger deficits it would produce would reduce the amount of capital available to businesses.”

No. And. Duh.

But that hasn’t stopped the assorted right-reverends from the left-wing from peering into the last Book of Obama and interpreting it for us.

In piece entitled “What the CBO Really Said About Obama's Budget,” chief economist Chad Stone of the so-far-left-wing-that-they-crawled-out-the-hallway-window think tank, the “non-partisan, wink, wink,” Center on Budget and Policy Priorities, made like the End-Times spiritualist to tell us, no, it’s not what you think. When the CBO says Obama’s budget would hurt the economy in the long term, they don’t REALLY mean that.

You see: There’s a secret message in the CBO report.

In Stone’s world of Dungeons and Dragons and Government, he compares Obama’s budget to a budget from an alternate universe that 1) doesn’t exist; 2) won’t ever exist ; but 3) at least shares the virtue of recording the same “yea” vote count that the last two Obama budgets have done.

Not surprisingly, the Highest of the High Priests- high as in “pass the ideological bong, dude”- Ezra Klein of the Obama press office that is embedded at the Washington Post, has named the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities his Think Tank of the Year!, calling it the "fastest, fairest, and smartest policy think tank in Washington."

Klein took a swipe at interpreting the Gospel of Obamcare earlier this year in his piece No, the CBO hasn’t doubled its cost estimate for health-care reform, explaining that “spending on Obamacare really isn’t going up because even though, sure, yeah, it’s going to cost more because Obama has made the economy worse, we still all know that, thanks to Obama’s virgin birth, Obamacare still remains the most effective deficit fighting measure that liberals have because we raised taxes in there, Amen.”

OK. I’m paraphrasing Klein there a little bit.

But hey, if he can be a divine, then so can I.

I’m getting the idea that if we were all to see the unvarnished fiscal truth of this administration, without the high priests interpreting for us -and without the liberal press averting their eyes- that our hair, like what happened with Moses, might turn solid white.

You could almost see Jay Carney’s hair turn white before your eyes as he channeled Obama earlier in the month.

Confronted by reporters, Carney tried to interpret for us the famous constitutional law Teacher’s parable of the Supreme Court and the Congress. It's a story for us about how Obamacare, as the New Law, was enacted as the fulfillment of the Old law, and the Supreme Court is just not as Supreme a being as Obama the Divine or a Democrat-controlled Congress, and, so, they, the Supremes, better not overturn The-Law-That-Shares-His-Name.

Watch Jay Squirm:  

In not quite the same vein, I can note, however, that without need for any of us to reinterpret it, that at least in the question of the birth control mandate brought to us through the Acts of Sandra Fluke, that we can all go and sin some more.

No need for the priests or press on that one.

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