Twenty-two House Republicans, led by Rep. Donald Manzullo of Illinois, have sent a letter to U.S. Comptroller General David M. Walker requesting that he review the processes by which the Department of Health and Human Services determines the effectiveness of 24 federally funded sex-education programs.
The congressmen note that one "Focus on Kids" program, which is aimed at students ages 9 to 15, "assigns teens to create a list of ways to be close to a person without having intercourse, including body massage, bathing together, masturbation, sensuous feeding, fantasizing, watching erotic movies, reading erotic books and magazines."
The congressmen's descriptions of the remaining programs we dare not print, given this is a family newspaper, and adults might be reading.
JUST GOT TOUGHER
"I kinda like being on the same platform as Senator Burns because he makes me sound like Shakespeare." - President Bush, attending a fundraiser this week for Montana Republican Sen. Conrad Burns, who faces some tough competition for re-election.
BUSH PICKS FLORIDA
President Bush is putting his money on No. 3-seed Florida to beat No. 11 George Mason in the NCAA basketball national semifinals Saturday; but then again, his brother Jeb is governor of the state.
Jim Martin, president of the 60-Plus Association, informs The Beltway Beat that Bush told him "Florida will probably win."
The president made the prediction after commenting on the Florida cap worn by Martin, who graduated from the university with a journalism degree in 1962 and received the William Randolph Hearst reporting award for creative writing.
Martin is rooting for Florida, even though his son attends George Mason.
WARMTH OF SPAIN
Global warming, whether man-made or by the hand of Mother Nature, seems to have everybody hot under the collar.
Competitive Enterprise Institute senior fellow Christopher C. Horner, counsel to the Washington-based Cooler Heads Coalition, arrived in Spain this week as one of four invited speakers to the conference "Kyoto: Solution or the Problem?"
"It was no surprise to find the Marxist student organization at Spain's elite left-wing university, Carlos III de Madrid, ripping down . . . 600 posters announcing the conference," Horner writes to The Beltway Beat. "After all, it featured 'evil' me as one of four speakers at only the second event ever hosted at the school for those advocating nonsocialist programs."
The evil label is compliments of Spanish Environment Minister Cristina Narbona, who publicly called Horner the devil for daring to set foot in Spain while bearing charts showing European "failure" to abide by the United Nations' Kyoto Protocol to limit greenhouse gas emissions.
Or as the Washington lawyer put it: Europe "is busy violating the energy-rationing agreement; Spain in particularly spectacular fashion."