How Obama and Henry “Yo Mama” Gates Can Woo Back the “White Devils.”

Posted: Aug 01, 2009 5:24 PM

If Rodney King’s dream of us “all just gettin’ along” is going to come to pass then Obama and Henry “Yo Mama” Gates, Jr. had better dial down on the insults, faux remorse and racial rhetoric aimed at us white devils.

Yep, the generational wounds of discrimination will not heal with Obama calling one of our nation’s best and brightest fair-skinned cops “stupid.”

FYI to BHO: That kind of talk, thoughtlessly slurring one of our finer whiteys’ intelligence, will leave a negative mark on our Caucasian consciousness. You can say we can’t jump, or we can’t dance, but you cannot call one of our tribe stupid when, in reality, the guy was just doing his job in an excellent manner while apprehending one of your belligerent, bigoted buddies (I wonder when/if we’ll ever hear the details of Gates’ conversation with Crowley’s superiors the night of Skip’s arrest? That would be interesting, eh?)

You’ve got to work with us white folk, Barack. We’re pretty easy. If you make a completely goofy and racial statement in a moment of flamboyant ignorance, all you have to do is say you screwed up, you’re sorry and that you’ll watch a Leave It to Beaver marathon as penance for jamming your foot into your mouth all the way down to your hip. And you know what? We Anglo Saxons will forgive and forget your foible and go on our merry way shopping at Pottery Barn, eating at the Olive Garden and watching Regis and Kelly (They’re a hoot!).

Because you didn’t choose to own your Biden-eclipsing blunder and instead attempted to assuage public outrage for thy transgression with a specious Beer Summit, you have left us gringos with no other recourse but to suspect your “post racial” posturing and believe, contrary to your claims, that you have indeed been affected by marinating in Reverend Wright’s diatribes for the last two decades. Yep, that Freudian slip minus heartfelt repentance makes us Americans deduce that the content of Ol’ Jeremiah’s sermons soaked into your psyche more than you would care to confess.

The resultant effect of this sophomoric glitch caused the shine to further come off Obama’s apple, according to Pew Research:

Obama’s comments on the arrest of Henry Louis Gates, Jr. appear to have played some role in his ratings decline. News about the arrest of the prominent African American Harvard professor at his Cambridge home was widely followed by the public and 79% are aware of Obama’s comments on the incident. Analysis of the poll data found that the president’s approval ratings fell among non-Hispanic whites over the course of the interviewing period as the focus of the Gates story shifted from details about the incident to Obama’s remarks about the incident. Interviews Wednesday and Thursday of last week found 53% of whites approving of Obama’s job performance. This slipped to 46% among whites interviewed Friday through Sunday as the Gates story played out across the nation.

Consistent with this trend, a small re-contact survey conducted Monday night finds a mostly negative reaction, particularly among whites, to Obama’s comments on the controversy, even though the public is closely divided over who was at fault in the original dispute. Based on what people have heard about the incident in Cambridge, 27% blame Gates, 25% fault the police officer, 13% volunteer both or neither, and 36% offer no opinion. However, more people disapprove (41%) than approve (29%) of the president’s handling of the situation. And by a margin of about two-to-one, more whites disapprove (45%) than approve (22%).

Seeing that there are still a bunch of white dudes in the US of A that you’ll need to sway on your way to the socialization of Amerika, if I were you, President Obama, I would trip over myself to regain that “post racial” ground you lost last week because you’re undoubtedly going to need some pale skin support for your agenda. A giant leap back into the good graces of the pigmentally challenged would be to a.) Truly apologize for your comments about officer Crowley, b.) Attend a Ted Nugent concert, c.) Prosecute the New Black Panther thugs that your DOJ just let off the hook for their voter intimidation and d.) Hang out with Newt Gingrich for a couple of weeks. That would be just peachy.