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Comment on: From Jesse 'The Mind' Norman

PRESIDENT JESSE "THE MIND" NORMAN AS A LIBERAL CANDIDATE

45 Comments
Sunday, January, 25, 2009 2:56 AM Cindy writes:

Are you starting to have that rank

feeling yet? Shifty don't fit everybody.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 3:13 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Cindy

I suppose I would be if I was actually running on that platform lol
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 3:16 AM Cindy writes:

I couldn't pull it off!

.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 3:20 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

maybe I could

then after my term write a book about how stupid people were to vote for me lol
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 5:20 AM INTHENOW writes:

Don’t let the libs get wind

of this essay.

The satire will be lost and we’ll no doubt see earmarks in the MSM bailout bill funding Gloryhole Theme Park.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 6:58 AM Neotrotsky writes:

Great Post

Sad thing is

Liberals might like some of these ideas LOL
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 7:04 AM Poppy writes:

Item #2

Retroactive abortions - very clever! Oh, and thanks for giving Crawfish the link to Algore's site commentary. I left a special message "for the children".
John
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 7:54 AM Ender writes:

Interesting stance.

Pure satire, if I'm reading it correctly, but interesting.

I'm a strong Christian, and I actually liked a couple of your proposals for the Church.

1) The 'obligatory donations' would be interesting. Given that their purpose is completely unscriptural, I can't see any real believers agreeing to it, but it'd be an interesting way to visibly identify the apostate congregations.

2) Gathering all Christians together at Guantanamo. I recognize that, presumably, most of your constituency would have little trouble permitting waterboarding in that case, but it'd also bring believers together. I once read a novel where the (fictional) POTUS started something like that. Christians, when found, were sent to 're-education' camps. At about the two-thirds mark in the book, they were deliberately identifying themselves so as to be sent; it allowed them to organize prayer networks for those working to expose the real plot the POTUS was part of.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 8:08 AM sgt.stryker writes:

Jesse

you got issues, son.

It's very disturbing to me, personally, your characterization of all 80's porn actresses as David Coverdale look-alikes. I hope that doesn't make me gay...

Speaking of which, as an uber-lib, what is your stance on gay rights?? You get that one right, you are a shoo-in.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 8:22 AM Gray Ghost writes:

I Refuse to Allow Smoky the Bear...

to be as assassinated! I have too many fond memories of him from the 1950's. Instead, may I recommend you do something to Al Bore?

Perhaps Bore's house in Tennesssee could be burned down?
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 11:07 AM davecatbone writes:

Tofu turkey

was my all time favorite Raymond episode. The shot of the reactions to a mouthful of the stuff....priceless....
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 11:57 AM American Sweetheart writes:

Jesse

You made me cry again!

But at least this time it is because I'm laughing myself right off of my chair.

Where do I get one of those free abortion cards? Do I really have to wait for Chrismas??
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 12:17 PM Bobbie writes:

Jesse, Jesse, Jesse.

You've outdone youself. You've pointed out the absolute absurdity of the left and made us smile. At the same time, I'm not sure how far from the upcoming reality some of your satire is. Like Gray Ghost, It would have been great if you'd have burned Gore's Nashville mansion down. Food for more thought?

Good work Jesse........Keep it up.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 2:50 PM dawndawn writes:

The Mind Reels, Again!

Jesse! You`ve got my attention! Can`t wait until you address public education and entitlements!
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 6:56 PM Mrs. AL (Always Learning) writes:

Well Heck, Jesse ...

with this kind of stance and platform, I don't stand a chance to be appointed Tsaress of the U.S. of A. Nuts.

Absolutely brilliant! Can't wait for the next installment!

Mrs. AL
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:31 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

INTHENOW

I definitely think there will be a proposal at the very least to bailout the MSM. The farther left the media outlet, the more trouble they are in. Just shows that cliche that the media is only interested in money is a fallacy. All they care about is pushing forth their ideology. Fighting their "good fight" for their lord Obama. I think libs should read this. Maybe they will see how silly some of their positions are. Not the hardcore ones. They can't be swayed. Moderates possibly can. I love exaggerating the truth to show the ideas behind the ideology. Thanks for the comment.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:33 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Neotrotsky

Thanks for the compliment. Yeah, I just took some of their ideas and turned it up to eleven (reference to "This Is Spinal Tap"). There will be more to come soon. I think I could do this for four years. Sad, eh?
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:35 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Poppy

Awesome that you sent Gore a message. I'm sure you saw some of mine. I just received a restraining order (not really). Thanks for the compliment. Spread it around. The more people see it, the better. I took the term "ovarian mulligan" from Dennis Miller. Have to give him credit for that term. Dude's a genius.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:36 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Ender

Yeah, all of this is pure satire. I'm just taking their radical ideas and turning it up a notch so people can see how ridiculous these ideas are. All in fun of course :)
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:38 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

bdubya

You're preaching to the choir man. I know I've got issues. Okay, some didn't look like David Coverdale. Some did look like Kip Winger. No, that doesn't make you or me gay. That's all there was. Remember, there aren't any homosexuals in prison.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:41 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Gray Ghost

Smokey must go. I would love for Gore's house to be turned into a bonfire of the vanities, but he would become the strongest proponent of the ice age hysteria and therefore would have burned the house himself. He'd be there in a polar bear fur coat and alpaca hat. Refer to blog...

http://jnormanii.blogtownhall.com/2008/12/28/my_interview_w ith_al_gore.thtml
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:42 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Dave

Never saw that one. I should watch the show more often. It was a good show.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:44 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

AmeriSweets

No, you will get your free card not long after my election. Satan Claus will drop more in time for Chrismas. Instead of reindeer, Satan Claus uses rottweilers to pull his sleigh.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:47 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Bobbie

That's exactly what I wanted to do. I have to say that this post was a beaut in my opinion. I usually don't laugh at my own stuff, but after reading this one I couldn't stop. I was also looking online for a good psychotherapist. As bdubya so kindly pointed out, I have issues. It's not like I didn't already know.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:51 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

dawndawn

Welcome back! I will get to some more entitlements and education in the next post on my presidential platform. I will also get to only allowing guns to convicted felons and those who fail a "hospitable citizen" test while breaking into the homes of gunowners and taking their weapons ala Elian Gonzalez.
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Sunday, January, 25, 2009 10:52 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

AL

Thanks for the compliment. Spread it around. Send the link to friends. I welcome all comments and readers.
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Monday, January, 26, 2009 3:28 AM Sue writes:

jesse

If I don't want a tofuturkey thing, can I have a different coupon for something else or do I get a choice?

And I can stand by while Smokey the Bear is shot dead. No way, no how! I don't think I can vote for you! :)

Oh code pink. Sort of forgot about them. I guess they got lost on the way to the capitol for the confirmation hearings! LOL!
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Monday, January, 26, 2009 3:41 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Sue

As long as the food you may want is not of an animal or a plant. Plants have feelings too. Smokey the Bear must be smoked. Right now Code Pink is looking for someone left of Obama. It's nearly impossible so that's why you haven't heard from them in a while. You will when they find me though.
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Monday, January, 26, 2009 3:46 AM Sue writes:

jesse

I just can't let that happen to Smokey, can't you find someone else to smoke out?

I have to say the Chrismas rewording is good. That one just might work!

You know, you could also state in speeches when you are campaigning that Hollywood people are going to fill your cabinet posts. And then we could all "ooh" and "aah because you know them! :)

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Monday, January, 26, 2009 3:51 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Sue

Maybe we could replace Smokey with the Bushes. Yeah, burn some Bushes. There's so much you can do with that. You can go biblical with the burning bush. You can go political with the anti-Bush. You can even go gonorrheal because I'm sure that's caused some burning bush. So many options.
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Monday, January, 26, 2009 5:06 PM Rich Boomker writes:

thanks

thanks for commenting on my blog! Yeah, your probably right, unfortunately Obama will likely get a second term even if he is worse then Jimmy Carter. But I am still hoping its only one term, four years will be more then enough. Haven't found a eight year count down clock either. Nice to see another blogger from the da region, even though we are in Indiana, Lake county sure has far to many Democrats. I am from Highland by the way. Loved your post! Great stuff
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Monday, January, 26, 2009 7:38 PM Gunny "knuckles" G© writes:

Jesse "The Mind" Norman

These will appear in Dopey McChange's next speech.
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Monday, January, 26, 2009 8:42 PM Ender writes:

I figured you were

being sarcastic, Jesse, but there was always the slight chance you were serious, and simply intending to follow it up with what seems to be the great Liberal-elect tradition of breaking every campaign promise shortly after taking office.

And a valiant try, but as one author I recently read (I think it was Ann Coulter, but can't recall for certain) said, the greatest strength of the Liberal Argument is that it is no longer susceptible to Reductio Ad Absurdum arguments.
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Monday, January, 26, 2009 9:46 PM KevInFl writes:

Re President Jesse...?

OK, OK! Ya had my vote up to assinating Smokey the Bear!! Now ya have gone too far, EVEN for a LIB!!!
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Tuesday, January, 27, 2009 8:47 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Rich

No problemo. I used to live in Lake Country, Gary specifically. Any pity given will be received with open arms. I loved the Lake County dems there. The local politicians two years ago knew the elections were coming but there was no way their citizens would vote for a republican so they hiked your property taxes up sevenfold. That's faith, my friend. They were also right. Come back anytime.
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Tuesday, January, 27, 2009 8:49 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

GunnyG

Dopey McChange eh? Think they'll come out with a McObama burger? It's meat taken from a red heifer without blemish, topped with extra virgin olive oil blessed by a priest, and a fresh manna salad.
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Tuesday, January, 27, 2009 8:50 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Kev

He's a stupid bear people! I mean stupid. He knows about the ice age and yet he still wants to prevent forest fires? How much scientific evidence does one need?!
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Tuesday, January, 27, 2009 8:51 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Ender

Sad part is there could be someone that runs on that very platform. Wait til the next installment. I'll try to make it at least half as demented.
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Tuesday, January, 27, 2009 7:29 PM MJSJR writes:

Jesse "The Mind"

The sad part is there is no satire here. The White House just printed out your post and Grover is actually going to use this at his next Press Conference to announce Lamont's agenda to remake America for the future.
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Tuesday, January, 27, 2009 11:43 PM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Lamont?

If you meant that the way it looks, then I should tell you that I don't want those kind of comments here.
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Wednesday, January, 28, 2009 9:23 AM MJSJR writes:

Jesse "The Mind"

A call him Lamont because "he's a big dummy"
Remember Sanford and Son. He did not want us to say Barack Hussein Obama so I just said let's call him Lamont because he's a big dummy.

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Wednesday, January, 28, 2009 3:14 PM Mrs. AL (Always Learning) writes:

Uhhh, Jesse ..

"Thanks for the compliment. Spread it around."
*****************
"Spread it around?" Yep, you're definitely qualified.

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Thursday, January, 29, 2009 2:24 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

MJSJR

Okay, that's fine. I've just heard people I know refer to some black people as Lamont as a racial slur. Thanks for clearing that up with me.
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Sunday, February, 01, 2009 2:38 PM Conservabear writes:

Not Smokey!

In defense of all good bears I would need to defeat you and thus save my Beloved Smokey Bear from such a fate.
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Monday, February, 02, 2009 10:27 AM Jesse "The Mind" Norman writes:

Conservabear

I welcome the challenge. Wait til you see the next installment. If you think this was disturbing, oh wait til you see the next. Smokey must go. I have gotten a lot of criticism for smoking Smokey, but we will be in an ice age. Don't you know that?! I'm like Spock. The good of the many outweigh the good of the few, or the one. The world will be behind me and my fatwa. Smokey must go. McGruff the crime dog is on the horizon.
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