Reflections on Manliness

...I was once asked the color of my Explorer and I answered, "blue", only to be corrected by a woman who replied, "It's 'seafoam green'".

Where are the "John Waynes"? [We'll leave his birth name out of it]

" I can hang a door, paint a wall, wire an outlet, fix a lawnmower, roof a house, maintain my vehicles, and generally keep things working smoothly in my world."

And if we don't know how, we will figure it out. And we're not sorry.

Well done.

Thanks. I kinda like this one. I was tooling around with the idea, looking for a uniting theme when I got sidetracked with the "Words" article. I finished it so it would be up this weekend.

I just get so frustrated with the limp wristed way men are portrayed on TV. We're not a bunch of Al Bundys or Homer Simpsons. That's what's been hitting my nerve lately.

So do you outsource your emotions, or just let Peggy Noonan handle them? (Kiding of course..nice job.)

I also agree that men are often portrayed very poorly on TV and movies. Shows like "According to Jim" showcase a blundering dad who most likely can't spell his name and deserves little respect based on his actions.

Below is the link to Dec 8th commentary on manliness which I thought you might find interesting.

http://albertmohler.com/radio_list.php

I'm a man Scatbug, I don't even outsource getting directions! As for my emotions, I keep a lid on them and use my intellect instead. It's a man thing; I don't think Peggy Noonan would understand.

That is exactly what I'm talking about! Why is every father on TV portrayed as a total loser with a wife way too good for him? And why would these women marry guys like that? The examples are endless: "Everyone Whips Raymon", "According to JIm", "The King of Queens", . . .

Why can't we have more characters like the dad's on "My Wife and Kids" or "The Cosby Show"? Good men that care and "get it".

Thanks for the link. I enjoyed it, and I agree with him 100%.

TV shows have Always protrayed the man as a blundering idiot. All the way back to radio.
Blondie- Dagwood
Life of Riley-
Baby Snooks-
Fibber Magee and Molly-
Amos 'n Andy-
Even shows that were not situation comedies the man was still the 'straight' for the jokes.
Jack Benny-
Allen's Alley-
And that is just Radio. In television it got even worse starting with The Stew Erwin Show and degenerating down to whatever pap they are feeding today. I quit watching situation 'comedies' sometime back and never saw Tex Ritter's son. Didn't even know who he was until he died.
When the networks have to use 'canned' laughter to tell the tv audience something is funny...it ain't.

Wow, you're old! Great Comment! Well said my friend.

another good one. You're on a roll. What color is Windswept Ocean, by the way?

Great line:

"When the networks have to use 'canned' laughter to tell the tv audience something is funny...it ain't."

Hey, you're the one that brought it up. Where'd you come up with it, anyway?

My last TH was 12/7. Am I missing something or did no one get anything yesterday/today?

As I stated in an earlier post, the male character is always the bumbling idiot and the female character always manages to pull things together.

But.

What if it were the other way around? Okay, let's take the radio shows My Friend Irma (Marie Wilson) and Burns and Allen. Marie was the certifiable first blonde flake. Even in '30's movies she was a dumb blonde but she always managed to land on her feet. Gracie Allen was probably better known because of her straight man, George Burns. In neither case was the dumb female a bumbling idiot. Rather their stupidity actually reflected on the dumber side of the straight guy i.e.:
Examiner at Drivers License: "Have you been driving a car and if so, how long?"
Gracie: "Yes, and it's about fifteen feet."
The one glaring exception to the rule is, of course, "I Love Lucy", which I did/do.
Well, the crux of the matter is us guys can handle the dumb end of the joke. Imagine what it would be like around the house the rest of the evening if there were a television program where the female was the stupid one. You would sit there for 30 minutes laughing your azz off. Then, slowly, you would notice a slightly icy silence from your spouse's side of the room. This would continue until she asked you some question like, "Do you think I'm like that?"
And you would answer, "Of course not, Dear."
"But you WERE looking at ME when you were laughing."
"But I was seeing if you were laughing."
"Do you think I am SO DUMB I can't see what's funny?" Here she sniffles a couple of times.
"No, but..."
"You men ALL think WE are a bunch of dummies!"
"No, really..."
"Besides, I didn't see anything funny in the way that poor girl was struggling. Supper's in the icebox. I'm going to bed. I have a headache."
So, you see, it is better to let the guys be the idiots.

I heard it in the backgroud on a home improvement show the missus was watching. It's still just blue to me.

Men are no longer valued. They are seen as barbarians and as too unintelligent to do anything.

We need more thought like this, better yet, more action to show the value of men.

Just a thought: after 9/11, it seemed men were back in vogue, how quickly that faded.

I think masculinity is hard-wired into every one of us "barbarians", just simmering below the surface. When the need is dire, the warrior emerges. The trouble is, it's an undiciplined and untrained warrior. Traditional values provide the discipline and training that made yesterday's men effective and respected warriors at need. Because of that respect, war was seldomn necessary. The reason the Islamists attack us is they have no respect for us anymore. If our media were a true reflection of our culture, they would have good reason. But I think there are more men like me around than they suspect. Let's hope I'm right.

I agree completely. And I think with the lack of true male role models, our kids grow up soft and confused. It is necessary that all these true men realize their importance to society.

this post. This country needs real men who are not ashamed of it. How many times have I had store doors slammed in my face because the man in front of me and my chldren didn't think he needed to hold it open it for me? Manliness is what women really want in men even if they have been trained to pretend it is not.

Scottie, Ditto. And,I'm not sorry either.

Is it just me? My passion for following sports has diminished since 9/11 and the older my daughter gets. My friend doesn't understand how I've become so engrossed in politics. He thinks they are all criminals and it doesn't matter who is in power. At the same time he will curse and yell at the TV every time Brett Favre throws an interception and will be sullen for days at a time after every Green Bay loss.

Another friend of mine asked me who I thought was going to win the Super Bowl this year. He asked me right after I had read an article on the Drudge Report about Nancy Pelosi's 6 in 06 so I was not in the best mood when I responded that I didn't really care. He was floored! How could I not care who was going to win the Super Bowl? I asked him, what it mattered. When was the last time the outcome of the Super Bowl had effected his life? His response...never. I then asked him what he thought about Nancy Pelosi. He said it doesn't matter who's in charge, they're all crooks.

Don't get me wrong, I love watching football and I root for the Broncos, but I don't lose a a bit of sleep when they lose. I have lost sleep over the 06 elections though. The America that we have come to maturity in, the one that has allowed us to work in and self-actualize in, is slowly fading before our eyes. The liberal onslaught appears too great, it seems all we can do is slow their progress not reverse it.

Each day I awake anew in anticipation that the backwards universe, where logic and reason are shunned, goes away. However, each days brings a new assault on right, good, and conservative values. It's not just an assualt on these values, it's that the opposite of these are embraced by so many people. In what kind of country is my daughter going to come of age? Is it going to be a nanny state that has taken place of the meritocracy in which we now live? That's what keeps me up at night.

In Africa, they managed the herds of elephants by moving the adolescent males to another preserve. The transplanted elephants basically tore the place up, fought, and made a mess of things. When a couple of old male elephants were introduced into this group, order was restored, the habitat recovered, and the veteranary burden was reduced with the sharp decline in infighting among the young males.

Teenage kids need Dads. Girls need to know their are loved and valued from a Father figure, and boys need a model to pattern themselves after. And it's not the talk that counts, it's the day after day walk that's absorbed. Moms want order and harmony. Dads favor growth and responsibility. Between the two, like a hammer and an anvil, kids are forged into good adults.

Equality isn't what it's cracked up to be is it? I don't think chivalry is dead, just dormant. It's been suppressed for so long by the more militant members of the fairer sex, that even decent men are reluctant to step up.

Once I encountered one of these feminists on the side of the road with a flat tire. She said "I don't want you to help me just because I'm a woman." I replied she could rest assured that was not the reason. After I'd finished, she asked me why I had helped her if it wasn't because she was a woman; I replied, "Because I'M a gentleman"

The absolute most important thing your kids get from you is your set of values. Not the ones you preach, the ones you live by. Be true to what you believe in and act accordingly and your daughter will internalize these things without any effort on your part or any awareness on hers.

I gave up sports when I went back to college. I just didn't have the time to study and follow sports, too. I'm became a CPA, so you can probably guess I'm very analytical and detail conscious. Sports just never recovered its thrall for me after that; it's just frivolous to me.

I have heard of that with the elephants before. Interesting to compare with our society now, huh?

As I recall, it comes from a PSA about the importance of fathers. There were a few articles about it a few years back.

It's sick what the feminists have done to masculinity...I'm happy to say I'm married to a real man who loves God and country, works hard and is a great example to all who know him, or come in contact with him.

Keep on keepin' on! We need good examples of true masculinity, and you described it the way it should be!

I loved every word you wrote in this article and by golly you have nothing to be sorry about. You are a good man and I wish there were more like you around. I'm a doting granny and proud of it.
Like you, my husband was a do it yourself man.
Our son has followed in his footsteps, he can do anything. That's how we brought him up.

I don't even know what a metrosexual man is quite frankly. I do know it does not sound the least bit inviting.
As a woman I want a man who acts like a man. But, I am old fashioned I guess. I want the man to open the doors, protect me, and treat me like a woman. But, I guess that's old hat too. But, I don't care.

Really good article.
Come on over and visit my blog sometime when you get the chance.

Always nice to have the ladies here at the Heartland. Maybe if today's men were more like traditional men, more women would be inclined to marry them. I know a lot of the problems with kids today stem from the lack of strong male role models in their lives. Tradition is the distilled wisdom of our ancestors; society should recognize that many of the pathologies we see today are a result of devaluing traditional manliness.

Thank you both for stopping by and leaving your comments. Come back anytime and contribute your ideas here. Now I'm off to see what Peppermint is up to at her blog.

It appears that we're cut from the same bolt of cloth.

I had to convert the wife because she's the typical Mom. The "here-let-me-do-it-for-you" type.

not anymore.

It's important for kids to do it on their own. Give them advice and training and let them go after it.

Will they screw up? Sure.

Will they learn from it? Yep.

I ask my kids "well, what lesson did you learn from that...?"

As you say, my son could care let what fashion is going on, what current fad, etc.

When another type A retired Marine and I BS at work, we're often addressed by younger women who say that they wish that their husbands/BF's could do stuff around the house. When my female coworker overheard that I finished our basement from top to bottom and even created more space by building a storage room UNDER the staircase she stated that she wished her bf could do stuff like that.

And I'm an amateur gourmet cook for Asian food.

The limp-noodle metrosexuals are to be pitied.

Fortunately my daughter has been educated to not give such losers the time of day.

I've told her from her pre-teen days, "DO NOT show up on my doorstep with a libturd loser."

...I fear for the "man" who arrives at your home and honks the horn for your daughter!

I thought you'd like this one. You have to let them screw up, or they'll never learn anything. Mom runs the house until they're teens, then Dad starts feeding 'em the rope. If they hang themselves, we cut 'em down, shorten the rope a little, and try again. Amazing how quick they learn. OoooRah my friend.

My daughter knew the date was over as soon as the horn honked. If they didn't have enough manners to get off their butt and knock on the door, they weren't worthy of my daughter's company.

I used to meet her dates at the front porch. Standing two steps higher, and being six-two gave me a considerable presence to these young men. My typical greeting was "I'm not going to have to hurt you tonite am I?" It always got the point across.

Glad you are acting right and taught your sons to do the same.

Thank you for stopping by and your kind comment. Please visit often, you are welcome.

James Biga at http://bigasrants.townhall.com/ has a link to an article on how " men " aren't very active at church and feel there isn't much for men to do at church anymore. Well what about Matt 28: 18-20 .. there is a whole world to conquer.

"I pronounce it as certain that there was never yet a truly great
man that was not at the same time truly virtuous."

-- Benjamin Franklin (The Busy-body, No. 3, 18 February 1728)

the manly men gone? Now I know they are here at Townhall.

You are hot, Scottie. (Three in the top five - Wow!)

Congrats.

Andrew left a link here somewhere that was also pretty good. Dovetailed nicely with the discussion. I'll check the link later this evening.

So good of you to drop by with such wonderful news. There are a few of us old dinosaurs left, and more just too scared to step up. Thank you for the heads up.

I'll be bad but you should see the looks of fear an old service buddy of mine puts into HIS daughter's suitors.

6 feet of half samoan and half italian and who benchpresses over 400lbs.

He has five daughters! haha. One time a turd pulled up and honked when I was visiting. After a two minute chat with Ed, he was educated.

He's a prison guard for a Fed Pen and gets NO PROBLEMS from the cons.

Here's too scaring the bejesus out one's daughter's suitors! LOL!

My buddy Ed lives in South Florida and his land borders a swamp. His line is:

"I have a .45 and a swamp full of garbage disposers. Any questions?"

Projection of strength prevents the need to project force. My daughter always said, "Dad, (insert boyfriends name here) is afraid of you. Isn't that silly?" And I'd always tell her, "I'm just a big ol' Teddy Bear*, Pookster. I don't know where he would ever get an idea like that."

* A 6'2", 220, former Airborne Ranger Teddy Bear that is! To her I was just Dad.

As a woman who is as unabashadely feminine in her sensibilities and role in her home, I'm truly worried about the state of boys in this country. It seems that at the same time young girls' interests are nurtured and supported (as they should be), young boys are left to fend for themselves--in a cultural climate that isn't always friendly to them. It's no wonder that a good husband is so hard to come by.

(I'm blessed with the sweetest husband ever...but will you come to my house and hang a door before our party this weekend?)

Welcome to the Hearland. I'm having quite a time with my two stepsons, but it's always a game of inches with kids. I don't know how the feminists ever sold the idea that Dads aren't important. Kids need their Dads, at least until they don't need them anymore. See my post "She's Leaving" for more thoughts on the recent twist I'm experiencing with fatherhood. Thank you for visiting and leaving a comment. Come back and share your thoughts, they are welcome here.

i am glad to be a woman and so proud of my manly-man husband. i married a wonderful man who knows the value of family, a good up-bringing, responsibility and a good work ethic. he hunts (just bagged a 12-point buck 2 wks ago), fishes (won in a rockfishing tournament this past weekend), works on our cars, knows how to use tools, can repair just about anything and how to treat the women in his life, starting with his mom, right down to our grand-daughter.
i don't like what has happened to the raising of boys in our country. honestly, it's perfectly pacifistic. if i'm in trouble, i don't want some pansy-a$$ metro-sexual nearby. i want a REAL man!
and i hate what the "feministas" have done for me. there's nothing feminine about the women's movement at all. for the past 16 years i get to have 2 jobs, one i go to every day and one i get to come home to. thanks all you women's libbers out there who made my life so much "better".

You definitely caught yourself a "keeper" there. Oddly, most of the men like this tend to be found in the red states, hmmmmm. It goes both ways, too. I lived in LA for six years, and couldn't find a woman in the bunch that shared my values. I came back to the midwest (Terre Haute, IN) and found myself keeper almost immediately. She's part girly-girl and part partner in crime. I'm a very lucky manly-man.

That was a great column and gave me cause to reflect on myself and my husband...Your Parents did a great job and so are you...I can only hope my children can learn as much from us! We try and instill the values and to show what is important. It's all we've got to do!

I am traditional...I know how to change the oil, but my Husband does it. I can fix anything if I want to. Instead, I play dumb so my children will learn it from their Dad. I can wield a weapon, but, it's a secret. I learned all these things and more just in case I never had someone to depend on.
I am teaching my children to fly away and stand on their own two feet.
My husband is a great Father, provider, teacher, athlete,scholar, "home" engineer,movie maker...Sometimes we forget in our daily lives what not to take for granted, don't we?
Thanks for reminding me.

Thank you for stopping by the Heartland. Please come by and share your thoughts, you are very welcome.

Nothing wrong with being a strong woman; but let your man be a man, and appreciate him for it. It's all he has, he's just a man.

Scottie, this is great. You should consider publishing in print.

First, Welcome to the Heartland. Always good to see a new face around here. I'm flattered and thank you. The whole point of the blog was to help me become a better writer. Must be working.

You're gonna love this article as well. Gotta give Dr. Steech his propers on this article.

http://drsteech.townhall.com/g/76e89f69-0961-43a9-a768-e409 8f6b7e25&comments=true#comments

Had my son read it earlier, then asked him what he thought about it. He grunted and said, "that's you Dad". Good boy.

Going to a wed morning Bible study at my church (I say Bible study, really it's more of a men's life group) called "The Quest For Authentic Manhood" and it's awesome. Too many boys growing up fail to get the direction that they need from their Dads (for whatever reason). They end up defining what being a man is based on a boy's reasoning. Here's hoping that more men take an active (and what should be) expected role in their son's lifes.

Shalom.

Thanks for the kind words. I'll have to admit, this is one of my better pieces.

This was such a great piece I printed 4 copies.
One for me and one for my son, and one for a
preacher friend in Arkansas, and one for a friend in North Carolina.
I really appreciate this article. Thanks.

I really liked this piece. I printed 4 copies.
One for myself, one for my son, one for a preacher friend in Arkansas, and one for a good buddy in North Carolina.
I asked them all to stop by and say hello to
the Scottie-Man. Hope they do, they can learn
something.
God bless.

I really liked this piece. I printed 4 copies.
One for myself, one for my son, one for a preacher friend in Arkansas, and one for a good buddy in North Carolina.
I asked them all to stop by and say hello to
the Scottie-Man. Hope they do, they can learn
something.
God bless.

I really liked this piece. I printed 4 copies.
One for myself, one for my son, one for a preacher friend in Arkansas, and one for a good buddy in North Carolina.
I asked them all to stop by and say hello to
the Scottie-Man. Hope they do, they can learn
something.
God bless.

Looks like you figured out how to post comments after all. Welcome to the Heartland and thank you for the kind words. I'll be over in a bit to check out your blog.

There are three points that you made that sum up what manliness is all about. Duty, discipline and good sense. Simple but rare qualities.
Thank you.

Welcome to the Heartland and do come back and comment when you can. You are most welcome here.