Talk Radio:
Bill Bennett
Mike Gallagher
Dennis Prager
Michael Medved
Hugh Hewitt
BREAKING NEWS
Register
|
Sign In
Search
SIGN UP NOW!
Columns, funnies & more in your inbox!
Login
|
What's Hot
Townhall Daily Alert
Your daily must-read of conservative columns, cartoons and news. Coulter, Sowell, Krauthammer and more.
White House & Capitol Report
Townhall.com’s weekly inside scoop on what’s happening behind the scenes in the world of politics. When news breaks, we report.
Daily Conservative Cartoon
Signup to receive the latest daily Townhall cartoons
Columnists
|
News
|
Video
|
Podcasts
|
Photos
|
Cartoons
|
Blog
|
Your Blogs
|
Issues
|
Get Magazine
|
Finance
What’s Hot
|
Your Blogs Directory
|
Create Your Own Blog
|
Featured Talk Radio Calls
Comment on:
Pesky Truth
Nancy Pelosi - Resurfacing Again? [Satire]
20 Comments
Sunday, March, 22, 2009 6:26 PM
Bobbie
writes:
Will this extensive refurb
withstand the elements? are multi layers of polyurethane required for maintenance? Sounds like Dr, Seymour Heine is an artist of the highest calibre. Of course, his nurse Eileen Dover is most likely a big help to him, except when he mishandles her causing squirting of crazy glue, afixing things together that were not meant to be so. Hope her brother Ben Dover doesn't take offense to said mishandling and kick Dr. Heine's hiney.
Hillarious as usual G92. Now my ribs hurt.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Sunday, March, 22, 2009 7:37 PM
Saltwater
writes:
I heard rumors
that the next procedure will involve installing turnbuckles like those used to tighten the canvas on a boxing ring. The hope is that will lower future maintenance time to minutes instead of days – and will be something she can attend to during those long breaks while the House votes.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Sunday, March, 22, 2009 9:43 PM
sgt.stryker
writes:
Garnet
This is just too much info (tmi as the kids say). We should be spared of the details regarding what it takes to keep Madame Speaker looking pristine! Now that you have let the cat out of the bag (was it Tummytuck in life #1?), expect a knock at your door...
Too funny, great post as usual.
Thanks also for the info re: hanging photos at my place, that worked great!!
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Sunday, March, 22, 2009 11:13 PM
Eric
writes:
now that is funny
yet scary at the same time....
Another after photo of Pelosi looked very similar to the Joker! Scared a lot of children.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Sunday, March, 22, 2009 11:58 PM
Garnet92
writes:
I have it on good authority that
the good doctor has Ms. Dover under his care as often as they can. Ben is gay and he's jealous of Eileen. Dr. Heine is also tending to Bertha and his receptionist (who is pregnant) ... Damn - this is beginning to sound like a soap!
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 12:02 AM
Garnet92
writes:
Wish I'd thought of the turnbuckles
Salt - that would have fit right in. My sources tell me that Dr. Heine is experimenting with a vinyl face (like a mask) that slips on and zips up the back. We'll have to see - with one of those, Angelina Jolie could wear a Pelosi mask and win Brad Pitt back (ah, true love).
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 12:08 AM
Garnet92
writes:
Bdub, I actually did some research
on street resurfacing to identify those details that might be necessary to make Nancy look presentable. Frankly, with the number that she is doin' on us, I was too kind.
Glad the photo stuff worked!
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 12:11 AM
Garnet92
writes:
I wonder how many Nancy Pelosi masks
we'll see at Halloween - or have the authorities banned them along with the other witches and ghouls? She WOULD be too scary for young kids.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 8:51 AM
Georgetwin
writes:
Garnet92
Nancy Pelosi, Joan Rivers, Octomom, what is it with Liberals and Plastic Surgery? BTW, is it me or is Pelosi looking more and more like Michael Jackson?
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 7:43 PM
dawndawn
writes:
Now We Know Why Kevin
calls mad-amn "Stretch"! Great post, Garnet! Love the names, Dr. Seymour Heine, Eileen Dover and Bertha Vanation! Don`t ever forget the closet perp, Checker Drawers! You would never get away with this parody "attacking" any "woman" other than nnnnnannnceeee! She definitely deserves it!
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 8:56 PM
clyde
writes:
Garnet
A 977 Cat TD with clay hooks and a Barber-Greene 4-lane paver couldn't fix that face.Even the master sculptor Gutzon Borglum would have a hard time with it.And he did 4 faces!
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 11:17 PM
Garnet92
writes:
Thanx for stopping by Georgetwin
Dunno about the plastic surgery bit, I think it is a fear of growing old and no longer be able to attract the opposite sex (whatever that might be).
As far as Michael Jackson goes, I wish I had the money that (?) spent on refurbing his parts. He hardly looks human anymore.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 11:22 PM
Garnet92
writes:
Well, Dawnie, she's brought it on
herself and deserves whatever we can heap on her. She is not only a "sk*nk," but she's a dyed-in-the-wool leftist liberal who doesn't give a sh*t for this country. She is beneath contempt.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Monday, March, 23, 2009 11:28 PM
Garnet92
writes:
You've got a handle on it clyde
The City of San Francisco would probably pass a bond issue to pay for Nancy's resurfacing, she is so good to them.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Tuesday, March, 24, 2009 12:51 PM
KevInFl
writes:
Ga of Nancy Prnet re Resurfacing
I cannot stop laughing!! This is a great post!!!!! Thanks for the laughs!!! You always seeme to top yourself! :)
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Tuesday, March, 24, 2009 1:17 PM
Garnet92
writes:
Thanks much, Kevin
Nancy Pelosi is such an easy mark. Haven't seen much of you lately - you doin' ok? I'll get by "View from the Right" later today.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Wednesday, March, 25, 2009 11:14 PM
Sue
writes:
Garnet92
Thank you so much for laugh. The wonder gal Potato!
Now remember, she won't own up to the fact that she gets work done. She splashes herself each night with cold water. I think she does it 25 or 35 times. I have to go back and find that article!
Too Funny!
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Wednesday, March, 25, 2009 11:46 PM
Garnet92
writes:
This one is dedicated to you Sue
I know the high esteem in which you hold the Speaker (sarcasism). I know that you're her biggest fan and I hope that my exposing these secrets about Nancy didn't disappoint you.
Seriously, I know that her head on a stake would make you happy! She is so goofy, she makes an easy target of ridicule.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Tuesday, April, 07, 2009 7:26 PM
Gar Swaffar
writes:
Does the
Bumped-her to bumped-her warranty include the drive train too?
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Wednesday, April, 08, 2009 1:21 AM
Garnet92
writes:
Nah, Boaz pre-existing conditions
exclude so many parts - her transmission is worn out, her rear end leaks and her front suspension is sagging badly.
Email It
|
Print It
|
Flag as Offensive
Sign Up to Post Your Comments
Sign Up to Post Your Comments
Please take a few seconds to sign up, then you’ll be able to post your comments immediately, use the action center, get podcasts, create your own blog and more! If you are already registered,
click here
.
Need an account?
Login
Login
Your Email:
Password:
Get Your Password
|
Register
Note: Fields marked with a red asterisk (
*
) are required.
Salutation:
Mr.
Mrs.
Ms.
Miss.
First Name:
*
Last Name:
*
Email:
*
Address 1:
*
Address 2:
City:
*
State:
AE
Alabama
Alaska
Arizona
Arkansas
California
Colorado
Connecticut
Delaware
District of Columbia
Florida
Georgia
Hawaii
Idaho
Illinois
Indiana
Iowa
Kansas
Kentucky
Louisiana
Maine
Maryland
Massachusetts
Michigan
Minnesota
Mississippi
Missouri
Montana
Nebraska
Nevada
New Hampshire
New Jersey
New Mexico
New York
North Carolina
North Dakota
Ohio
Oklahoma
Oregon
Pennsylvania
Puerto Rico
Rhode Island
South Carolina
South Dakota
Tennessee
Texas
Utah
Vermont
Virginia
Washington
West Virginia
Wisconsin
Wyoming
*
Zip:
*
Townhall Daily Alert
Your daily must-read of conservative columns, cartoons and news. Coulter, Sowell, Krauthammer and more.
Townhall.com Spotlight
(Bi-Weekly) We highlight the best opportunities from our partners for surveys, action items and more.