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Comment on: Heartland Patriot

On Wooing Women

37 Comments
Sunday, April, 13, 2008 8:56 AM Jimmy Carter writes:

I think You omitted a very...

...critical asset: LISTENING.

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Sunday, April, 13, 2008 11:25 AM Scottie writes:

Jiimmy

It has to be believable to work!
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Sunday, April, 13, 2008 2:10 PM ScarletPimpernel writes:

you have to say it

in a manly manner, though.
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Sunday, April, 13, 2008 2:32 PM clyde writes:

Scottie

Good post,I would add don't forget to say "Honey,I was wrong".
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Sunday, April, 13, 2008 5:11 PM Scottie writes:

Scarlet Pimpernel

Of course, goes without saying bro.
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Sunday, April, 13, 2008 5:12 PM Scottie writes:

Clyde

Or better yet, "Honey you are right!"
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Sunday, April, 13, 2008 6:52 PM Nee writes:

bahahaa!!

With my Sugar Daddy, he just smiled and said, "So, You like Bryan Adams?"(my fave music) I think that means he had me at Hello! He may lack in an area or two, but he is THE KING of Suprises.
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Sunday, April, 13, 2008 10:32 PM Scottie writes:

Nee

I'm certain he got more than he bargained for; and good for him.
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Monday, April, 14, 2008 10:21 AM BrianR writes:

Listening?????

Ugh; who wants to hear all that drivel?

But: "I'm one helluva cook" works wonders.

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Monday, April, 14, 2008 11:16 AM Chris writes:

The real question...

do you press the "clear" button when finished using the microwave?
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Monday, April, 14, 2008 6:44 PM ShiningCity writes:

Is this thing on?? tap tap tap

I hate to be the bear-er of bad news, but someone's got to say it. I've met many-a-bachelor who had the cleanest apartments, were the best "purse holders" at the mall, would follow me anywhere, and always put the toilet seat down--I suspect that's become some of this group sit when they pee. Where's the excitement? Ho hum.

I think when you're 45, the traits you listed rise on the "pro" list very quickly. But they are always, always, underneath:

a. Kisses well (this is #1. You men seem not to trust me on this, but it's to your detriment...) A man can leave toilet seats up every time, and if he kisses well, it's immediately forgiven.
b. Laughs and makes you laugh
c. Cooks
d. Appreciates "good music" (what constitutes good music is what varies from woman to woman)

(and for anybody in the "Under 35" age group: substitute for b & c: owns a motorcycle and plays the drums)
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Monday, April, 14, 2008 6:45 PM ShiningCity writes:

PS

(Lovely to see a post from you again)
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Monday, April, 14, 2008 8:00 PM Scottie writes:

Shining City

Well, I'm a pretty good smoocher, or so I'm told.
The Missus and I laugh all the time and I do have a quick wit.
I was taught to cook by my father, a souis chef for the Disneyland Hotel
And I like any genre of music when it's done very well.

As for your wanting a biker musician, good luck with that. Unemployed and out all night isn't a very good starting point.

And when your sisters hear about your toilet seat blasphemy, they're gonna revoke your union card.
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Monday, April, 14, 2008 8:02 PM Scottie writes:

Chris

No I don't press the reset button. If you don't know its not 0:45 o'clock, too bad. But I do set the clocks on all of the appliances to the correct time, so maybe I'll get some slack there.
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Monday, April, 14, 2008 8:08 PM Scottie writes:

Brian

So did you cook that rat you were holding in the infamous pink shirt photo? Nothing a good bernaise sauce wouldn't help. (I kid, I kid!)

Any bachelor worth his salt can cook. It frees up funds for more and better guns!
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Tuesday, April, 15, 2008 10:49 AM BrianR writes:

Right on, Scottie!

More and Better Guns... in caps because it's my motto.


That damned dog... not even a subtle Bearnaise would do the trick there, m'man.

Anyway, he refused to stay still in the marinade.
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Tuesday, April, 15, 2008 11:07 AM Chris writes:

Scottie...

...touche.
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Tuesday, April, 15, 2008 12:21 PM SquiddyPopPerkyJean writes:

Yep, when it comes down to it,

you've got the right elements there!

And Shining City, of course, added some important ones. I need a man who can have a sense of humor. A clever wit can make an "ugly" man gorgeous.
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Tuesday, April, 15, 2008 12:53 PM ShiningCity writes:

Nonono.

Scottie, you came in and said, "well I can do all that too." But, I'm taking issue with your post, which said essentially: "this is all a man needs." I'm JUST saying that those details are nice, but if that's all he brings, then uh, I don't know. I like to laugh more than go shoe shopping.

Also, I qualified that the women under 35, of which I'm not one, likes the motorcycles & drums. We all know they are stupid.
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Tuesday, April, 15, 2008 3:10 PM The Interface writes:

What?!?

You mean my wife DIDN'T marry me because of my devastatingly good looks?!?!?

http://wherearemykeys.blogtownhall.com/2007/09/07/face_gets _his_own_post.thtml

Well, I am shocked! Veritably shocked and dismayed! I demand a recount!
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Tuesday, April, 15, 2008 11:50 PM Scottie writes:

Interface

after seeing that picture, and upon sober reflection, I can safely say you are probably the exception to the rule. She obviously fell for your good looks. What gal could resist a face like that?
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Tuesday, April, 15, 2008 11:51 PM Scottie writes:

Shining City

You confuse the men you date for fun with the keepers. You'll be older one day, then you'll understand.
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Tuesday, April, 15, 2008 11:54 PM Scottie writes:

Squiddy

A good sense of humor covers a lot of ugly, that's a fact.
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Wednesday, April, 16, 2008 12:56 PM 1maschrom writes:

Scottie


I love your essay! And can you PUH-LEZE explain the importance of putting the toilet seat down to my husband! The man is CLUELESS.

Seriously, the secret to my long marriage is that we are best friends. We would rather spend time with each other than anyone else on earth. I once joked that it would be pointless to divorce him since he would have to come over every day to hang out with me (plus there's that whole I can't sleep alone thing).

SC, it's more important to me that my hubbie loves MY sense of humor. He thinks I'm the funniest person he's ever met. He even laughs at me when I'm arguing with him! It's hard to be mad at someone who is laughing at you and telling you how postively irresistible you are when your angry! He calls me his little firecracker. LOL
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Wednesday, April, 16, 2008 8:38 PM Sgt Relic writes:

Scottie

What you have described is a man that has been married for decades. They rarely come that way straight from the box. That's a nice look in the lab coat, very spatial.
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Saturday, April, 19, 2008 10:16 AM Scottie writes:

1maschrom

My dear little firecracker, ALL men are clueless! Hence this article.
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Saturday, April, 19, 2008 10:19 AM Scottie writes:

Sgt Relic

You are correct, but then that's the point: to pass along the secrets of success garnered over a long life to the younger bucks. My advice will ease them along the path and help them avoid the pitfalls we've both often found ourselves in. Or they can buy a motorcycle and take up drumming and date physicians!
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Monday, April, 21, 2008 4:27 PM ShiningCity writes:

Ok. (Large sigh)

Scottie: Just see post #1.



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Friday, April, 25, 2008 2:10 PM Linda writes:

what time is it?

Scottie: "If you don't know its not 0:45 o'clock, too bad." Lol!!

I have to concur, quick wit is HUGE.

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Monday, April, 28, 2008 4:06 PM Christopher writes:

Another key

Among the world of women, a key to survival is to forfit over all common sense wisdom when she presents you with a problem. She does not want your solution, she wants to vent.

Just nod your head, act empathic and then if she continues going on, repeat steps one and two.
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Monday, April, 28, 2008 4:16 PM Scottie writes:

Christopher

Yep, men think women are asking for help solving a problem and women think offering unsolicited help is somehow helpful . . . and ne'er the twain shall meet.
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Monday, April, 28, 2008 4:56 PM Scatbug writes:

Very good advice

As a guy who on April 20 celebrated his 17th anniversary (that would be wedding anniversary, btw), I can confirm every syllable in your post. Plus, Jimmy of course has the other key element of "listening", which also has a corollary: "at least pretending to listen and nodding your head a lot, unless of course she asks if she looks fat, then treading water until you can think of an escape such as, 'Let's say we go buy some new blinds', or 'Didn't you mention wanting to get a new comforter and dust ruffle for the bed? I think Macy's is having a sale.'"
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Monday, April, 28, 2008 8:25 PM Scottie writes:

Scatbug!!

Thanks for dropping by bro. Long time no see. If I can learn to put the seat down, women can learn to quit asking if jeans make them look fat. Seems fair to me.
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Tuesday, April, 29, 2008 2:30 PM Scatbug writes:

Indeed

that is a good trade [still cracking up].

And with the Obama campaign making it's own comedy material, how could I stay away?
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Tuesday, April, 29, 2008 4:46 PM Ken the Playful Walrus writes:

"I Can Pay Off All Your Debts"

How about that one?

Actually, one of the reasons my wife and I married each other is becaue we are BOTH financially responsible and avoided debt (except for a reasonable mortgage). When I married her, I didn't end up paying for past trips to Cancun or clothing long since discarded.

Let's see, how about "I will never say to you 'But that's not the way my mother cooked it.'"?
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Wednesday, April, 30, 2008 12:17 PM Scottie writes:

Ken

That would be a very wise statement to avoid. My boy Charlie stumbled into that one about his Mom's cooking. He's healing nicely.
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Wednesday, May, 07, 2008 2:47 PM Virginia Daddy writes:

Ha

I'll add another line to the spell: "I'm sorry."
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