With the Edwards campaign about to be minus a blogger or two, I am officially tossing my hat into the ring to be his new blog-master. As an audition of sorts, I’d like to show Edwards and his team the kind of quality campaign blogging I’ll be able to provide with the following sample post:

February 27, 2007

It was a long day on the campaign trail. The Senator began his day by rising at 5:00 a.m. As is his custom, he dropped to his knees and said a prayer to the lord, who makes all things possible. Then he quickly readied himself to take his message of hope to the hopeless.

John and those of us lucky enough to be part of his entourage boarded the campaign’s eco-friendly private jet, The We Can Do Better, and flew out to tiny Minburn, Iowa to meet with ordinary Americans just like the Edwardses. John was gratified that most Minburnians seemed to take the day off to hear his address.

As he began his speech, he noticed that several of Minburn’s urchins were shivering from the bitter Iowa cold. Where children in one America have rich cashmere coats and furry galoshes sheltering them from the elements, these ragamuffins were garbed in colorful but essentially useless rags and were mostly unshod.

John told the assemblage to excuse him and he walked out to talk to the youths. Nobody could hear exactly what he said, but we all saw him take off his own jacket and blanket it over the shivering children who thanks to John’s largess shivered no more. Then, in spite of the bitter cold, the jacket-less John returned to the podium and finished his speech. He said, “The cold doesn’t bother me now. I am warmed by the fire from the grateful children’s hearts.”

As we flew back to North Carolina on the We Can Do Better, John was obviously in a somber mood. He said that he just couldn’t get the image of those freezing moppets out of his mind. He reminded all of us on the plane that that’s why he’s running: To make a better future for kids like that. (Frankly, the comment was kind of a downer and those of us in his employ have to hear that crap approximately 23 times a day. But he writes the checks so we indulge him. In the war on poverty, Edwards is a tireless warrior!)

Thankfully, the flight attendants soon lifted all of our spirits by bringing us our daily afternoon canapés which were even more delicious than usual. If you ever get to travel with the Edwards campaign, be sure to ask for some extra smoked salmon – you’ll thank me. And the rack of lamb lollipops – like butter!! I’m generally not a big lamb guy, but these things are amazing.

It was late afternoon when John returned to his eco-friendly house. As is his custom, he walked through the connector that leads to The Barn and looked at the pictures from his past days in politics. Normally these images give him great pleasure, but obviously nothing could dispel the memory of those hapless Minburn youths.

When he got to The Barn, he purposefully strode past the basketball court, the squash court and both stages before zipping up to John’s Lounge. He paused only briefly to scold the youthful chimney sweep for some shoddy work. John told him, rightfully so, that if the young punk wants to transition from one America to the other, he’ll have to pay a little more attention to detail.

Once safely ensconced in John’s Lounge and being warmed by a roaring fire, John had his houseboy pour him a glass of Zinfandel. As he sipped the wine, I could see a tear well in his eye. He said to no one in particular, “We can do better.”

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