I agree that Republicans need to find a better way to articulate their "culture war" issues. To borrow Thomas Sowell's word, they need to learn to "talk" about them. Several points:
1) by insisting that the law enforce their view Republicans have become vulnerable to charges that they only favor small government until it's time to create their "theocracy," to dictate what a woman can do with her body, etc. There are two responses to this. Republicans should make the point that intact families are better for everyone based on purely secular statistics about financial well-being, and they should argue that perverse incentives (like the infamous marriage penalty in our tax code, for example) need to be removed from public policy.