Sodomy is anything but "gay." We need to take the word gay back from the perverts.
And yes, let them call their pairings "marriage." They only want equality! How dare we deny them their rights!
Next legalize pedophilia. This is another persecuted minority! All pedophiles ask is equal rights! As guaranteed by the Constitution!
And polygamy! Consider the persecuted and disrespected polygamists! All they want is equal rights under the law! How dare we judge their love and (multiple) commitments! What have numbers to do with anything when love is involved?
And the bestialists! They only want equal rights to express their love of animals! Who are we not to allow the union of a man and a sheep to be called a marriage? Shame on us bigots!