Have you patiently waited for months and years for the State Department and Department of Homeland Security to slog through your application? You're chumps!
Have you paid thousands of dollars in travel, legal and medical fees to abide by the thicket of entry, employment, health and processing regulations? You're chumps!
Have you studied for your naturalization test, taken the oath of allegiance to heart, embraced our...











Clowns work hard to perfect their art. The government simply doesn't work.