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Women Serving in Combat Positions Is a Batty Idea

jaybird8 Wrote: Jan 27, 2013 1:38 PM
'Battle Buddies.' It was crazy. I was twenty-six years old but I couldn't go to the bathroom by myself." Women are going to take on the North Korean infantry, but need protection in the ladies' room. Military policy is endlessly fascinating. From Military Medicine, October 1997, from the Pentagon library: One-third of 450 female soldiers surveyed indicated that they experienced problematic urinary incontinence during exercise and field training activities. The other crucial finding of the survey was probably that 13.3% of the respondents restricted fluids significantly while participating in field exercises. (p. 690) Why? Because peeing was embarrassing. Yes, women make great soldiers!

Last Thursday Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta and other U.S. military leaders lifted the ban on women serving in combat positions. I, for one, think this is a great idea and have a few modest proposals, if the brass inside the beltway is open to suggestions, on how they should deploy the dames (and whom they should deploy).

First off, if you truly want to eviscerate the enemy—namely Muslims—then I propose sending the most nerve grating and foul women Hollywood has to offer straight into hot zones as our forward armies. I’m a thinkin’ starting off with Roseanne Barr, Joy...