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Thanks, Guys: Federal Government Concludes Mermaids Do Not Exist

Billy158 Wrote: Jul 06, 2012 9:50 AM
Great work, guys...glad we got that settled. Now let's throw a few billion dollars at a new committee, and find out once and for all about those unicorns.

Check out this page from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration's website, from the Ocean Facts subheading, and revel in your tax dollars' latest effort: the federal government has just informed us that mermaids aren't real. Because we were so concerned before!

The belief in mermaids may have arisen at the very dawn of our species. Magical female figures first appear in cave paintings in the late Paleolithic (Stone Age) period some 30,000 years ago, when modern humans gained dominion over the land and, presumably, began to sail the seas. Half-human creatures, called chimeras, also abound in...