1) Guns for making all those poor innocent criminals break the law.
2) The old, dead white guys who founded America and their ridiculous, outdated Constitution that doesn't mention global warming or limits on soda size even once.
3) Nosy voters who ask questions like, "What kind of change?" and "Forward to where?"
4) Adorable little kids who want to run lemonade stands...WITHOUT A PERMIT!
5) The fact that Sarah Palin is the single best feminist role model in a generation while the Left's #1 feminist role model, Hillary Clinton, built her whole career around marrying the right guy.