Thanks for the memories. For the shadows, too, as they lengthen across yet another year, aging but not withering recollections of years gone by. The memories become more precious as the shadows deepen. Those of us of a certain age remember parents and grandparents no longer with us, who gave us their unconditional love with the discipline to live good lives. We hope we're giving back in equal measure.
Every generation thinks the one before it lived life at a slower tempo. One of my favorite bracelets is made of old typewriter keys, and no one under 10 has any idea where such things came from. When we speak of "the War," we have to be careful to say which war we're referring to; only a tiny handful of veterans of "the Great War" (of 1914-1918) are left, and the veterans of World War II, the youngest of whom are in their ninth decade, will be gone soon, too.
It's a cliche that you only connect directly to the contemporary art, literature and styles of your own generation, and when you're on stage it feels as though it will last forever. But it doesn't. In his 60s, my father began to describe himself as a "has been." His heady days of promoting world-championship prizefights, mingling with Joe Louis, Billy Conn and Max and Buddy Baer, were past. He invested the money he earned to make his family comfortable as they aged, but it was clear that he missed what he called "the action."
Today, "the action" is likely to be on the Internet, bringing people closer together while pushing them farther apart. Is there anything colder than Internet matchmaking, where the lonely risk ego in search of affection? A picture may be worth a thousand words, but one friend who trolls for dates online says he learned to add 20 to 30 pounds to the figure in what is nearly always an old snapshot.
We're all living longer, and it's easy to believe that "70 is the new 50." Advances in health care contribute to a lively seniority. But after a certain age, it's clear that George Bernard Shaw got it right when he said that "youth is wasted on the young." The end of the year forces each of us to look back on the years of rights and wrongs, pleasures and mistakes. We're pleased to remember some decisions, but the list of things we might have done differently is a long one.