Why shouldn?t these men ?get married?? That would allow the sick man to take advantage of the healthy man?s health insurance, and it wouldn?t cost the healthy man much, if anything. Oh, sure, it would cost his employer and his insurance company quite a bit, but that?s not really his concern. After all, it?s simply unfair that all those married people he works with get to take advantage of spousal health benefits while his sick, unemployed roommate can?t.

When the second man gets another job, or when either man finally meets Miss Right and decides to settle down, they can always get divorced. After all, there?s no stigma attached to divorce these days.

Or how about this scenario: A woman, after graduating from college, moves back in with her widowed mother. This woman never marries, because she?s so busy taking care of mom that she never has time to date. The way things stand today, when her mother dies, this woman is left with nothing. But, if they could ?get married,? the daughter would be eligible for Social Security survivor?s benefits.

Author and homosexual rights activist Davina Kotulski insists that marriage conveys more than 1,300 rights and privileges. Isn?t it blatantly unfair that the young woman imagined above, who?s devoted her entire life to taking care of her mother, is ineligible for all these benefits? Surely she?s as devoted as most spouses are.

Some, of course, will say none of this could ever happen. They?ll claim that platonic roommates or mothers and daughters would never attempt to get ?married? because society wouldn?t accept the union.

Well, 20 years ago, I can remember visiting my father?s office. There was one item on almost every desk: an ashtray. Almost everyone in that office (including my father) smoked. If you?d told me in 1984 that, within a generation, smoking would be illegal in virtually every public building, I?d have laughed. Too many people smoked -- banning it would have seemed impossible. But society changed. The acceptable quickly became unacceptable.
That can work the other way, too.

When it comes to marriage, society would also change, this time for the worse. The unacceptable would quickly become commonplace. Plus, we?d all end up paying more for our health insurance and we?d be adding millions of dollars worth of commitments to Social Security, even as the venerable program approaches bankruptcy.

Federal action will be needed to address all this. DOMA will be back. And that?s a promise, not a threat.