Rich Lowry

Celebrity family values are so complicated. Kevin Federline dumped his girlfriend Shar Jackson when she was seven months pregnant with his child to marry Britney Spears. Now, Britney is six months pregnant, so it's that time again. Kevin allegedly can't handle the stress of her pregnancy, and, according to Life & Style Weekly, "he's turned to his ex for comfort!" Kevin just can't manage to be with whatever woman he impregnated most recently.

US Weekly promotes on its cover, "Brad & Angelina: A New Secret Romp." Wait a minute. How secret can it be if it's on the cover of US Weekly and Life & Style Weekly, too ("New pics show they're one big happy family")? US Weekly talks of the "secret strife" in Nick and Jessica's marriage. Secret? Like the tree falling that no one hears in a forest, a celebrity secret that no one reads about doesn't really exist.

These magazines are geared, of course, to women. No one can blame them for picking the magazines up for tips, say, on how to accessorize or diet. And men's magazines are just as insipid, only with more cleavage. It's the obsessive interest in celebrities that is creepy. What does it say that so many of us live vicariously through a set of people who generally are weird, shallow, and uninteresting, no matter how many exclamation points you put on the end of it?

Rich Lowry

Rich Lowry is author of Legacy: Paying the Price for the Clinton Years .
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