Between them, Dick Cheney and Al Gore have held the title of Vice President of the United States for the past 13 years and one month – give or take.
This past weekend, separated by some 8,000 miles, they each managed to take careful aim and completely miss their marks.
First, Vice President Cheney who shot a 78-year-old man, Harry Whittington, while ALLEGEDLY aiming at a quail although why Cheney thought the bird presented a clear and present danger in the first place has not been fully explored or explained.
The fact that the wounded man is a lawyer, gives Cheney bonus points right off the bat. The fact that Cheney got caught doing it, subtracts those same points.
It turns out that the Veep didn’t have the proper stamp to hunt quail. No word, yet, on whether he had the appropriate creds to hunt lawyer.
Mr. Whittington, yesterday, suffered a mild heart attack after one of the bullets traveled through his blood vessels into those feeding his heart muscle. Whittington may well sue to cover the cost of the magnet he will have to wear as a necklace from this point forward.
The White House press corps was in full howl over the fact that they weren’t instantaneously informed of the incident, implying there may have been a cover up.
Memo to press corps: The Secret Service agents who accompanied Cheney are … COPS.
As a card-carrying member of the NRA, I want Wayne LaPierre to change the saying to:
Now to Al Gore who was in attendance at the Jeddah Economic Forum in Saudi Arabia this past weekend.
I have no idea how much he was paid for this gig, but the locals got their Riyals’ worth if you measure worth in pandering.
Even Jim Krane of the Associated Press, saw the story (thus proving the old adage that even a broken clock is right twice a day) when he wrote:
Gore told the largely Saudi audience, many of them educated at U.S. universities, that Arabs in the United States had been "indiscriminately rounded up, often on minor charges of overstaying a visa or not having a green card in proper order, and held in conditions that were just unforgivable."