The Importance of Family Meals

The truth is that both parents and children experience more joy and satisfaction in life in general when we are part of a strong family unit. One study conducted by The Associated Press and (believe it or not) MTV, found that spending time with family is the number one activity that young adult children between 13 and 24 said makes them happy.

So what are you waiting for?

As a mother of three, I know how difficult it can be to manage schedules -- especially of three young adults all running in different directions and wanting to spend time with their friends in the summer months. But several years ago when my children first hit their teen years and I discovered the fierce competition for their time, I forged ahead, designating nights each week when we would absolutely eat together. And I found that adding one simple sentence to the mandate opened up a whole new world of fun: "Your friends are welcome to join us." This firm but inclusive directive made for many now-treasured evenings when we bond with our children and their friends. The time, laughs and discussions have a powerful impact on all of us.

It makes sense when you think about it. When your children know that your being with them is a priority for you, they feel valued and loved. They also begin to understand that the sacred bonds of family will sustain them through any challenge life throws at them.

If you're feeling at a loss on how to get and keep those kids gathered around your table, CASA offers great ideas on how to make meals interactive and enjoyable. Their fantastic website www.casafamilyday.org was designed with your family in mind. As CASA says, "Dinner Makes a Difference."

henry37 Wrote: Nov 18, 2009 12:01 PM

Our family had always done that. Both my kids are now young adults and away but whenever they return, with the addition of a son-in-law, we do the same thing.

Additionally, each one of us pray instead of just me praying and express our thankfulness. Kids will often pray for their friends and things that bother them. I suggest that you have each member of the family families pray. Atmosphere at the table is going to be different for sure.

I miss those days and is now eagerly awaiting their return next week - for Thanksgiving.

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lilly18 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 3:55 PM

What makes you so silly and combative? Having worked with families and children for many years, I can tell you that family dysfunction is equal opportunity and can't be broken down by political ideology. The "microwave children" who prepare their own meals while parents (or often a single parent) may be working double shifts or having an affair or taking a class or at the gym doing crunches or passed out drunk upstairs can easily be in either a Conservative or Liberal household.

And, take this to the bank---if you are a parent who is physically in the home, emotionally present to your children, and providing food, your home will very soon become irresistible to other people's children whose home isn't like that. PLEASE don't turn...

Waski_the_Squirrel Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 1:50 PM

The only reason families don't eat together is because they don't make it a priority. They can claim "overscheduled" all they want but the truth is that if it's important to them, they'll find a way: whether it's eating later, dropping activities, or choosing a different meal.

It's easier to give in to the kid when he claims he'd rather grab fast food with his buddies between activities. Then the parents have time to do their own thing and the family doesn't actually have to get together.

Like Hagelin, I want families to make this work and, even though they won't admit it, so do the "obnoxious" teenagers in the family.

ca7 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 1:37 PM

"I could actually see liberals not agreeing with this. You see, liberals censure anything remotely conservative."

I don't know why you think liberals don't enjoy family time or why you feel the need to turn this into an "us vs. them" issue. I actually agree with this column. Growing up I ate 5-6 meals a week with my family. This continued through high school. What a liberal might point out is that eating together as a family is a positive thing to do regardless of the make-up of the family, whether it is a single parent household, cohabitating couple without kids, same-sex parenting household, or even the good old-fashioned traditional nuclear family like mine. I can't imagine any liberal disagreeing with the basic point of...

Dave 4198 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 1:03 PM

Like Jo, I'm amazed that this even needs to be said. One or two days a week I usually miss dinner because of the demands of my job, but other than that, my wife and kids know that we're eating together (strangely enough, 90% of the time I do the cooking, not my wife), and if I'm not there, they are eating with my wife. One thing not really mentioned, it's a great time to enjoy your kids. I may not like everything that they do or say, but I do love them and a relaxed family dinner is a great place to nurture that love.

Reba5 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 12:19 PM

It does make a difference that quality time is spent toether as a family. I raised two robust, engergetic sons. The rule of sitting down every evening at the dinner table was well understood, TV was off. It was the time we shared their day, their concerns and their desires with them.
We shared many activities with them while they were growing up. I even learned how to row a canoe.
It was in the years when the drug culture was growing, but I am proud to say they were never influenced by it and are fine young men now.

The 'ole saying, "families that pray together, stay together", is still true.

Bad Albino Bob Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 11:17 AM

We always ate together. It wasn't five days a week. It was every day of the week, with exceptions only for real need to be elsewhere. We also raised some of our own food. All of our children, boy and girls, also learned to cook (and the girls also learned basic auto mechanics and carpentry). Is it coincidental that none of our kids got involved with drugs, had legal problems, or dropped out of college? I don't think so.

Liberals hate that. We see the evidence here. Were their own families so alienated that they feel envy, or do they think they have a better ideal of what the family should be to put in its place?

Jo312 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 10:21 AM

surprised when something like this is a surprise.

Not only do we eat together but we grow 80% of our food (Garden, beef, hogs, chickens). I suggest if you have a patch of dirt to grow something together, it is educational,there is satisfaction in providing food for yourself, and you'd be amazed how much information you can learn about your kids while tending to even the smallest garden.

Also, you should PLAY together. My teenage kids love to show their friends (who eat, sleep, and practically live at our home) how bad I am at video games. (Rock band and Halo aren't anything like PONG or space invaders!)

Family, should listen and learn from each other. The article is right, teens do not do drugs, or get in trouble...

RW6 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 9:19 AM

Rebecca H. is much like the Food Channel's Sandra Lee. Both are hot blonde MILFs, great to look at, and in both cases I couldn't care less about the content they offer.

PS... is TH even more sluggish than usual today?

Roger731 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 8:31 AM

Highly recommend Rebecca Hagelin's Book "30 Ways in 30 Days"

binc Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 8:02 AM

Not only does sitting down to eat together promote healthy family relationships, serving food actually made from scratch, not full of additives and such, promotes better and healthier eating habits and less obesity.

One3 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 7:56 AM

I could actually see liberals not agreeing with this. You see, liberals censure anything remotely conservative. This castigation doesn't result from pondering the nuances of an argument, but rather a default position that anything traditional is bad. Liberals have been waging war on the traditional nuclear family for years, asserting that single parenthood is actually admirable. The family dinner epitomizes the nuclear family experience and if liberals don't support the nuclear family itself, I doubt they see much relevance in a solid foundation to that nuclear family.

I blog regularly about the destructive components of modern liberalism at my blog. Here's an example:

Tracey20 Wrote: Jul 08, 2009 7:33 AM

this is great advice, my kids are small now so it's easy to do family dinners together, I love how you encourage your teens by inviting their friends, that's a great idea, thanks

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