For example, my own children are well aware of the policy at our house when it comes to renting films: If it has worse than a PG rating – Mom or Dad will watch it first to determine if our teens can see it. R-rated movies are off limits. Yet, because many of their friends' parents have given in to the "battle over the ratings," my teen-age sons will frequently present me with a popular PG-13 or R-rated movie at the video store, just to see if it would be OK, this one time. I always respond, "The answer is the same tonight as it was last weekend, and last month, and the month before that: NO." It's become sort of a game for our family, but it's really a lesson for all of us in the importance of setting standards and keeping with them.
Like it or not, we're teaching our children from the moment they come into the world. They watch us like hawks. As they see us obey laws, treat others with respect and remain faithful to our spouse, they learn to do those things, too. If we engage in watching raunchy videos, use foul language or cave-in to the cultural pressures on us as adults, how can we expect them as children, to not give-in to pressure?
For those parents who have the fortitude to fight the battle on behalf of their kids, there isn't a lot of reinforcement to be found. Abstinence-education in schools can be helpful, if the programs truly teach kids to say "no." But beware: Many programs have the word "abstinence" in the title but send a mixed message – instructing children what to do if they decide to have sex, instead of making them realize that their health and happiness depend on waiting.
As a Heritage Foundation study last year found, "many traditional safe-sex programs now take to calling themselves 'abstinence plus' or 'abstinence-based' education. In reality, there is little abstinence training in 'abstinence-based' education. Instead, these programs are thinly disguised efforts to promote condom use."
Heritage Foundation research also proved that real abstinence education can help cut sexual activity among youth. But as the example above shows, it's up to parents to make sure the program their children are in is a good one.
As parents, most of us would do anything to protect our children if we saw they were in danger. Unfortunately, this survey proves that too many children today are in danger. Parents are the first – and often the only – line of defense for today's youth. Your mission is clear, Mom and Dad. As Dr. Laura would say, "Now go and do the right thing."