You will receive neither eternal reward nor eternal damnation
but might face eternal resentment if your son and daughter-in-law
discover what you've been up to. They may well consider the
religious guidance of their children to be a parental
prerogative, reasonably enough. For anyone to intervene, even a
well-intentioned family member, might confuse the kids (if they
are old enough to recall your idiosyncratic ritual) and undermine
their relationship with their parents. One ethical guideline: a
description of conduct that begins with "I snuck" is apt to raise
doubts.
To a secular person, an incantation whispered over an infant
is harmless nonsense. But as a believer, you should be aware that
Catholicism regards baptism as a sacrament to be performed by a
priest except in an emergency, when anyone may step in. But
"emergency" is generally held to mean the imminent death of the
child, not a doctrinal dispute with the parents.
Randy Cohen
Randy Cohen writes "The Ethicist" a weekly column for the New York Times Magazine, syndicated by Universal Press Syndicate in newspapers throughout the U.S. and Canada.
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