Neal Boortz

Allergies, I’m told, can be cumulative in nature. This happened to me with eggs. For years I burned some eggs pretty much every morning for breakfast … literally burned ‘em … hash browned eggs … until finally the doctor told me no more. Allergic. So much for the Hollandaise.

I’ve seen allergies sneak up on people like this before. You spend most of your life, for instance, in the Northeast. Massachusetts, maybe, or New York. Everything was working pretty well, health wise, until the last five or so years. Gradually you started feeling more tired and lethargic. Your work ethic went away. You head was stuffy to the point you stopped thinking clearly. You used to be able to go outside your home and feel relatively save, but no more. Now when you go outside your home you’re assaulted with a variety of noxious pollens that immediately bring about sneezing, coughing, a headache, and an intense desire to be somewhere else.

So – you move. You’ve identified the trees and plants that are causing you these problems. You did a bit of research, perhaps traveling to different locations, until you found somewhere where those trees and plants don’t grow, and you moved there. Immediately you felt better. You felt perfectly safe leaving your home knowing that there was no pollen waiting to assault you. It was a completely new life – a healthier life – and you were enjoying it immensely.

Now … would you mind answering a question for me? Seriously. Put some thought into this. If those trees and shrubs were causing you such an allergy problem where you used to live, and if you felt better immediately after moving to a place where those trees and shrubs don’t grow; could you please see if you could muster up the intellectual firepower it would take to explain to me why – after all this – why you start planting the very trees and shrubs that almost completely destroyed your health in your new back yard? On what possible level does this make any sense? These plants nearly killed you where you used to live, and now you want to plant, grow and nourish them in your new home?

Allergen producing plants aren’t the only things that can cause you grief and make your life a choking misery. There’s something else out there that can make your life miserable, cause you to feel bloated, tired, out of sorts. This allergen can destroy initiative and make you lazy and unmotivated. It robs you of the joy of achievement and the rewards of hard work. There are but a few places in this country where this weed hasn’t taken hold, and those places are threated. The noxious weed I’m talking about is Democrat big government liberalism.

So ... here’s what I’m driving at here. I live in Naples, Florida. Naples is a very successful smaller city ... or town, if you will. A year or so ago Naples scored the highest life expectancy for women, and was number two for men. The recession hit Naples, of course, but not nearly as hard as other areas of the country. There’s no state income tax in Florida, and in Collier County and Naples having to deal with a county or city employee, for a new license plate, for instance, is rarely unpleasant. Crime? Well some woman did attack a man at the beach with a swim noodle last year. Unemployment in the Naples area remained lower than the nation, home prices are recovering and the economy is vibrant.

So for the last 50 years people have been moving to Naples to escape the mess they caused by putting liberal Democrats in charge of their old hometowns. They’ve fled high taxes, poor schools, unionized work forces, crime, corruption and the economic malaise that comes packaged with most Democrat governments. No problem! That’s great! It’s called “voting with your feet.” Our country was founded by people fleeing an oppressive government for more liberty! It’s much the same thing as moving away from all those allergy-causing trees and shrubs to a new area where the air is cleaner and your teeth don’t itch.

Now my question: If you moved to Naples, or to Texas, or to a number of other low-tax regions not run by Democrats to improve your enjoyment of life, then can you please tell me just why in the hell you want to then turn around and put the very same species of politicians – liberal Democrats that chased you away from your old home – into office in your new home? Why would you plant those allergy-causing plants you moved to get away from in your new back yard? You move to an area where Republicans are and have been in control of the government for decades because you like what they’ve created, and you start voting for Democrats? Are you NUTS? Are old self-destructive habits that hard to break?

There was a little Naples rally in support of Hillary Clinton over the past weekend. Twenty people showed up. That’s 20 too many. What is your problem? Do you think it is people like Hillary Clinton that made our town the great place to live it is today?

Look at Colorado! That place used to actually make sense! Then people fleeing high-tax, highly-regulated California came there to take advantage of a lifestyle created by small-government Western conservatives, and now look what you have? Hickenlooper? Sounds like a disease, doesn’t it. Irrationalitis Democratus. Are you kidding me?

Our request is simple. If you love big government creating a dependent class of parasites and choking the life out of business, stay the hell where you are. You DID build that … so stay there and enjoy it! Self-reliant, liberty-loving Americans built something entirely different in Naples, in Texas and in other havens of rationality. If you want to move here, fine. But can you leave your noxious weeds behind please?


Neal Boortz

Neal Boortz, retired after 42 years in talk radio, shares his memoirs in the hilarious book “Maybe I Should Just Shut Up and Go Away” Now available in print and as an eBook from Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com.


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