Mike Adams

Lately, liberals (read: statists) have been giving me a hard time about my opposition to a gun control initiative that would limit gun purchases to one per month per owner. Since I a) don’t like the government telling me how many guns I can own, and b) just hate having liberals (read: statists) mad at me, I’ve come up with a solution. It takes the form of a New Year’s resolution sure to make everyone happy (myself especially).

I hereby resolve to help the cause of gun control in America by purchasing only one gun per month in 2008. Naturally, I am providing a list of those guns below with pretty pictures you can access with a click of the mouse. I hope you enjoy the following selections:

January - Beretta .32 Auto Tomcat

This is a great little gun to purchase if you are having trouble finding a gun that will fit inside the fanny pack you use when you are jogging. Of course, I don’t use a fanny pack when I am jogging but after I buy this sweet little Beretta I’ll have a good excuse to buy one.

February – Walther 380 Auto

This year I plan to adopt a nineteen year old girl who still has two years of college left (at Bucknell University). Her boyfriend is pretty big but he’s often busy studying for medical school. So I plan to buy her this stainless 380 for personal protection. It is both an accurate and a reliable weapon. Plus, she thinks it’s “cute.”

March – Sig Sauer 226 9mm Elite

My friend Barry Whitehead shoots a Sig 9mm with a 3.9-inch barrel. The gun is so accurate that I can hardly imagine the 4.4-inch barrel version to be better. But I plan to find out with this lovely spring purchase. Just in case a Democrat is elected president I want to make sure I have plenty of 9mm weapons that take 15-round magazines (before they re-ban them). This Sig fits my requirements and it’s also “cute.”

April – Smith and Wesson Model 610 10mm Revolver

Mike Adams

Mike Adams is a criminology professor at the University of North Carolina Wilmington and author of Letters to a Young Progressive: How To Avoid Wasting Your Life Protesting Things You Don't Understand.

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