We need to find a new name for ?diversity experts.? The term ?expert? implies that one possesses superior knowledge. But, since the diversity movement says that all ideas are equal, there can?t possibly be superior knowledge. So, of course, there can?t be any experts of any kind. That?s why I suggest we call them ?car alarms.?
Replacing the term ?diversity expert? with the term ?car alarm? really makes sense if you think about it. I?m sure you remember when car alarms first came out. Every time someone got near a car with an alarm, it would just go off. At first, it was a really big deal, but, eventually, people just started to ignore them.
That?s the way it is with the soon-to-be-formerly-known-as-diversity-experts. When they first opened their offices, they just started shouting ?Racism! Sexism! Homophobia!? to everyone who walked by. Now, people tend to ignore them. I should know because those people (did someone just hear an alarm go off?) have shouted me down on a few occasions.
For example, in 1994, I made the mistake of publicly expressing my support for California?s Proposition 187, which would have taken the children of illegal aliens off the welfare rolls of the State of California. As soon as I stated my position, a car alarm (then called a diversity expert) went off, shouting ?Racism! Racism!? It sounded a lot like ?move away from the car! The police are on the way!?
Of course, it wasn?t racism. I just don?t like illegal aliens or welfare.
Recently, the car alarms went off again when I proposed a new way to deal with illegal immigration in America. The idea involves granting temporary worker passes to all illegal aliens willing to work on a giant wall that will run along the U.S./Mexico border-all the way from Texas to California. The wall would be built almost entirely by illegal aliens. But as soon as they come within ten feet of finishing, all the illegal aliens would be fired and sent back to Mexico, which would, of course, be only a few feet away.
American workers would then finish the job and take full credit, hanging a sign that says ?Made in the U.S.A.? on the finished product. I would call it ?The Great Wall of Chicana? and dedicate it to their mothers.
The car alarms didn?t like that idea very much either. But it?s not racism. I just don?t like criminals, illegal aliens included.