Welcome to the National Frauds' League.
Guns and Ammo magazine first broke news last week of the sports empire's rejection of a commercial created by gun-maker Daniel Defense. The polished paid spot emphasized home security protection and self-defense without even showing or mentioning any of its actual products. But a quick flash of the company's logo at the end of the ad, which includes a DDM4 rifle, apparently violated the NFL's high-minded advertising regulations.
The fantasy-land football ad policy document will launch even the casual Super Bowl viewer into a fit of gigglesnorts. It outlines copious content restrictions covering alcohol, "nude or semi-nude performers," firearms, gambling, and "movies, video games and other media that contain or promote objectionable material or subject matter (e.g., overtly sexual or excessively violent material)."
The NFL is free to accept or reject any advertiser it wants to, of course. But its "prohibited content" list seems a far more accurate description of your average Super Bowl half-time performance and ad rundown. Between Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunctions and Beyonce's leather-clad dry-humping, the football execs have embraced lucrative vulgar ads over the years that have featured:
--An upside-down clown who appears to pour Bud Light beer up his rear end.
--A bizarre sex-change operation analogy to tout Holiday Inn's hotel upgrades.
--A barefoot Kenyan runner violently dragged to the ground by white hunters and forced to wear a pair of Just For Feet running shoes.
--A flatulent Budweiser horse whose emissions cause a candle to torch a woman's hair.
--Ad characters getting electrocuted, run over by buses, kicked, punched, tackled, thrown out of high-rise buildings, and attacked by crotch-biting dogs.