Michelle Malkin

(Seattleified: Give non-aggression a chance.)

History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. -- General Dwight D. Eisenhower

(Seattleified: We refuse to rewrite this offensive statement. It is a hate crime against the weak and timid.)

The best form of defense is attack. -- Karl von Clausewitz

(Seattleified: The most preferable form of defense is a sit-in, candle lighting, and survival kit with bottled water, Nutella, environmentally safe non-plastic sheeting and homemade cornstarch paste (a non-industrial alternative to duct tape).)

Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall! -- Ronald W. Reagan

(Seattleified: Mr. Gorbachev, we will maintain a non-judgmental posture toward the Communist regime. P.S. Do you think Moscow would be interested in being our new sister city?)

I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears, and sweat. -- Sir Winston Churchill

(Seattleified: We have nothing to offer but tears, tears, tears, and tears.)

Never give in -- never, never, never, never, in nothing great or small, large or petty, never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense. -- Churchill

(Seattleified: Always give in -- always, always, always, always . . . )

My good friends, for the second time in our history, a British Prime Minister has returned from Germany bringing peace with honor. I believe it is peace for our time . . . Go home and get a nice quiet sleep. -- British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain, the Great Appeaser, after handing over Czechoslovakia to Hitler to avoid war

(Seattleified: Perfect! We wouldn't change a word.)


Michelle Malkin

Michelle Malkin is the author of "Culture of Corruption: Obama and his Team of Tax Cheats, Crooks & Cronies" (Regnery 2010).

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