The biggest problem is that writers Ted Elliott and Terry Rossio assume we’re already in love with their characters, and therefore waste no time giving us a reason to fall for them again. They give us a lot of Captain Jack (Depp gets plenty of screen time) and also not enough Jack as he spends all that time engaged in high-action pursuits that never allow us chance to reconnect with his loopy charisma. Rather than focusing on the quirky characterizations that made the first movie a hit with audiences of all ages, director Gore Verbinski falls back on the Bruckheimer-ism that big crashes and big spectacles are what put tushies in the seats. And while that is true to a certain extent, when a film is nothing but action sequence after action sequence, no matter how big the bangs, it can get a bit wearing. (It’s never a good sign when the desire to check your watch overwhelms the desire to see a giant CGI sea monster attack a ship for the third time.)
All of this is tolerable and, unfortunately, expected in a sequel. However, what is not tolerable is an ending that fails to tie up even one of the threads the previous two hours introduced. Does Elizabeth still love blacksmith-turned-pirate Will or is she now enamored of Jack? Will tentacle-face Davy Jones succeed in hauling Jack down to the briny deep or will Jack find a way to outsmart him? Does the wormy Lord Beckett take control of the seas? I’m not saying none of these questions get answered…Well, yes, actually, that is exactly what I’m saying, and if it’s a spoiler to reveal there’s nothing to reveal, so be it.
It’s one thing to end with a cliff-hanger in a film that was always part of an acknowledged series, ie., Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, The Godfather. But Pirates I was no first installment in a trilogy. It was a story complete and unto itself. Therefore, when Pirates II introduces a whole host of new stories and characters and doesn’t bother to wrap any of them up, its likely that many viewers will leave crying, “No fair!”…But they’ll also pony up another 8 to 10 bucks to find out how it finishes in the next episode, and maybe that’s what Bruckheimer and Verbinski were counting on.
Dead Man’s Chest has already pillaged the box office for $132 million, as well as broken several major records. Unfortunately, while an acceptable summertime amusement, it certainly doesn’t earn that kind of booty. Perhaps its successor, to be released in Summer 2007, will.