Disclaimer: I've been dreading writing this article for months.
Last year North Carolina passed a constitutional amendment stating that marriage is only between one man and one woman. I not only supported this amendment - I campaigned for it. But in light of the ACLU’s latest challenge against the amendment, I think it is only fair for me to let everyone know that my opinion has changed. Yes, I flip-flopped.
Following the passage of the NC marriage amendment, I made a YouTube video that quickly went viral. In that video I stated why I believe marriage should be between one man and one woman, and personally, I still believe this. I am a Christian, and I believe God instituted marriage. I also believe that God clearly defined marriage as between one man and one woman. But while I do still believe this, politically, my opinion has changed.
As a conservative, I support small government and individual freedom. I believed I was doing what was right when I spoke out in support of the marriage amendment, and I still believe there is much truth to what I said. But at the same time, as a pro-small government Conservative, I feel hypocritical wanting the government to regulate marriage.
But while my opinions on government regulation of same sex marriage have changed, I still do not like what the ACLU is trying to do. If the government must define marriage, it should be left to the people in each state to decide, not some judge being pressured by the ACLU to overrule a constitutional act. The majority of North Carolinians, for example, decided to define marriage as between one man and one woman. But if the majority of Californians want to define marriage otherwise, go for it! Leave it to the states, not the oversized federal government or activist judges.
If I could have it my way, I would love for everyone to get married for the right reasons, theologically speaking, and be happily married until death parts them. But unfortunately, we do not live in a perfect world. Instead, we live in a world plagued by sin. Regardless of what type of marriage it is, alarming majorities begin marriages for the wrong reasons, which end in bitter divorces. The institution of marriage was disturbed long before homosexuals were pushing for the right to marry. I do not support divorce (except for the biblical reasons of infidelity or abandonment), getting married for the wrong reasons, or same sex marriage. But I do support freedom, and everyone’s “right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness,” even if I disagree with their choices.
With all of that said, I do understand both sides of the argument, especially considering I’ve now been on both sides. I support everyone’s right to agree or disagree with me.
At the end of the day, my response to the Same Sex Marriage debate is honestly a shrug of my shoulders and a, “Whatever.” What people do in their personal lives, morally speaking, is for them and God to sort out, not me and them. This debate is not worth the hatred and vulgarity that it ignites. We have much more important battles to be fought.