Katie Kieffer

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke: Mr. Bernanke will attend in a lime green sweater featuring an image of Dr. Seuss’ notorious character, “The Grinch,” and the words: “THE GRINCH WHO STOLE THE DOLLAR.” By recklessly printing money with his quantitative easing (QE) bond-buying binge, Bernanke is taking the risk of setting us up for another bubble of economic trouble.

President Barack Obama: Mr. Obama will attend wearing a blue sweater with an image of a reindeer running over the Affordable Care Act and the words: “OBAMACARE GOT RUN OVER BY A REINDEER!” (He’s tried to shake off his broken promises by saying he got: “burned already with a website”… he’s running out of new excuses!)

Your sweater: If you want to up-stage the other guests on the list, here is the perfect (non-ugly) sweater for you to wear: a gold sweater embroidered with the inspirational pro-First Amendment words from Buddy the Elf: “The best way to spread Christmas cheer, is singing loud for all to hear.”

Well, I can’t wait to see you at the party. Don’t be late!

Katie Kieffer

Katie Kieffer is the author of a new book published by Random House, LET ME BE CLEAR: Barack Obama’s War on Millennials and One Woman’s Case for Hope.” She writes a weekly column for Townhall.com. She also runs KatieKieffer.com.