You can't just suddenly start carrying around a Bible and expect to convince people you're a believer. It is also dangerous to invoke the Bible if you're not that familiar with it, as Howard Dean proved when he expressed his admiration for the book of Job, which he erroneously placed in the New Testament.

If you like Job, you know where it is.

Being religious clearly doesn't hurt a political candidate, but keeping it real is critical. As Barack Obama, the newly elected U.S. senator from Illinois, said in the current issue of Time magazine, Americans hunger for authenticity. Kerry's defeat had as much to do with his perceived lack of authenticity as with the "God Gulf." He simply never rang true.

In Wisconsin, for instance, when Kerry was trying to project his inner populist, he shuffled through his hobby box of Hallmark stories and came up with this sparkler:

"When I was 12 years old, my passion was being allowed to go out and sit on the John Deere and drive it around the fields and plow. And I learned as a kid what it was like looking back and see those furrows, and see that pattern and feel a sense of accomplishment."

Ah yes, ye olde furrowed fields 'n' plow anecdote. No wonder voters were wowed.

In another manly vignette aimed at hunters and gun owners, Kerry spoke of his love of deer hunting. As reported in the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel, Kerry said:

"I go out with my trusty 12-gauge double barrel, crawl around on my stomach. I track and move and decoy and play games and try to out smart them. You know, kind of play the wind."

I hate to break it to Bwana, but deer hunters usually seek elevation (think deer stand) or else they're likely to get shot themselves by one o' them Bush-lovin' religious fanatics collecting rattlesnakes for Saturday night's revival.

Although Bush was as privileged as Kerry growing up, he nevertheless is able to connect with regular folks. Human chemistry, after all, isn't related to birth, money or social standing, but emerges from and registers on an instinctual level. You've either got "it" or you don't.

Sort of like religion.