I've had more than a few people ask me if there's a bright side to our bleak economy. Is it that retailers are having more sales? Or that people are learning to buckle down, pay off debt and get some money in the bank for a rainy day?
I think all of the above is true, but I'd like to add one more silver lining to the list as well: This recession has the potential to crank open the lines of communication when it comes to money.
Don't get me wrong. The subject is still fairly taboo in our society. It's not acceptable dinner-party conversation to ask someone what their salary is, or how much they have invested for retirement. And I'm not sure it ever will be.
But because we're all pretty much in the same boat -- most people are losing money these days, whether in the stock market or because of a layoff -- talking about these struggles may start to become a little bit easier.
"In a way, there's this sense that people are not necessarily as in your face with the things that they're buying. Even when you look at the news, the theme is to use what you have. People don't feel like they're in this alone, which can be very helpful," explains Robi Ludwig, a New York City psychotherapist.
Still, we're going to have to work to get there. Most of us were taught at an early age that, like sex, money was not to be discussed. Turn on any television channel during primetime, though, and you'll quickly see that we've long since gotten over our issues with sex. Why not take this opportunity to tackle money?
-- Start small. In this case, that means working on your own issues first. Trust me, you have them, even if you can't pinpoint them right away. "Money is so wrapped up in self-esteem, which makes it a very private thing. We relate our salary or our income to our place in the world," says Hilary Black, editor of the new book, The Secret Currency of Love, a collection of essays written by women about money and the effect it has on their relationships. You may be basing a portion of your self-worth on your bank account balance without even realizing it. Instead, try to pinpoint the things that make you feel fulfilled free of charge, along with your positive qualities that have no bearing on your wallet. Write them down, if it helps, and stick the list on your fridge.