Whiny Atheists Protest Charlie Brown Christmas Special

Doug Giles

11/28/2012 8:57:00 AM - Doug Giles

The atheists I grew up with in Texas were a tad bit pluckier than today’s lardy hagfish atheists who file lawsuits every winter when they see a child wrapped in swaddling clothes.

Yep, the anti-theists I used to hang out with in the Lone Star state were rugged individualists who were so busy milking this existence that they didn’t have time to bleat like a stuck sheep because a plastic baby Jesus statue endangered their delicate beliefs.

My other non-believing buddies who weren’t the robust Hemingway types were usually heady stoners who were into physics, Pink Floyd and Frisbee and were completely comfortable around people of faith versus today’s reflexively irate, touchy atheists who pop a blood vein in their forehead if they accidentally hear “Silent Night” playing at Macy’s.

For God’s sake atheists, übermensch up why don’t you?

The latest hissy fit thrown by the anti-theist this Christmas is over Charlie Brown. Yep, according to Fox News “Charlie Brown is in the middle of a contentious religious fight. A group of parents are fighting an Arkansas elementary school over a field trip to see a stage production of ‘A Charlie Brown Christmas’ at a church. Fox News religion contributor Father Jonathan Morris weighed in on the controversy today on Fox and Friends. Father Morris asked, “Who would be afraid of their children going to watch a classic Charlie Brown story like this?” He said, “The fact that we have the right to free speech for all means that there’s going to be also an opportunity and a probability that there will also be people who will do stupid, ignorant and totally out of line things like protesting the fact that Charlie Brown is going to be presented, and his Christmas story presented to kids.”

According to the 21st century metrosexual atheist motif, anything that offends the pouty atheist should now be banned. That makes me scratch my head because I thought the atheists were the tough-minded ones who could stare death in the face and mock God and His dictates, but now a silicone statue of Yeshua in diapers puts them in a tailspin. Hello, sweetie.

FYI to the spindly atheists: You’ve got your work cut out for you if you want to scrub culture of its Christian influence because we have rubber stamped this planet via the arts and human expression for many, many moons. Have you ever heard of Bach, van Eyck, Vermeer, Handel, Mendelssohn, Haydn and a writer named Billy Shakespeare? What about the artists of the early Italian Renaissance or the tens of thousands of other artists, writers and composers throughout history who were either die-hard believers or at least worked within the framework of a Christian worldview? Are you going to take a belt sander to their works because they remind you of Hey-Soos?

You know who did atheism right? The late Christopher Hitchens. He didn’t whine or sue schools for singing “Oh, Come All Ye Faithful.” What did he do? He vigorously argued his point of view, engaged the brethren without being a shrill priss and left it to the audience to decide what path they were going to take, and I dig that kind of robust character. That said, as you can tell, I have no respect for atheists who want to ban Christian symbolism because they don’t happen to buy it.

Merry Christmas.