Before I became a Christian in my early twenties, I was raised on a steady diet of Playboy, Penthouse and MTV. So, from a motivational and pursuit standpoint, I had more in common with Tommy Lee than I did with Billy Graham. For many moons I did not treat my body as a temple, but rather as an amusement park. By way of confession, if you’re struggling with the negative soul and life effects of giving free reign to the gibbering monkey in your pants, I can empathize and can honestly state: I feel your pain.Lust has got a hold on our culture’s short and curlies. Stevie Wonder can see that. We’ve got a bazillion dollar internet and terrestrial porn industry. I bet it won’t be long ‘til personal computer companies start installing keypads with splash guards. Our nation’s got tribes of teenage boys and girls who have been raised on Lindsay, Britney and Myspace.com who are more sexually savvy than sailors were 20 years ago.
Older people are buying into the cult of sexual pleasure also. Old women who should be growing old with their sexuality and dignity are instead donning mini skirts to show off their beef jerky-like legs and are having tether balls crammed into their chest in a desperate attempt to relive their college days. Here’s a tip for you grandmothers out there: Don’t wear a mini skirt if you are also wearing Depends; we can see them. And here’s some advice for you old guys: if you have man boobs, as Dennis Miller says, don’t wear tight T shirts; it confuses the children. And please, please would you guys quit making out in public? It doesn’t look right. I have to watch several Disney movies just to clear my head after seeing seniors gettin’ after it during a summer matinee.
Yes, the First Church of the Crotch is alive and well in the USA. We’re being sold by these icky evangelists the greatly exaggerated notion that we’ll find nirvana via our sexual nerve endings. Indeed, the prophets of porn tell us, we will forever be fulfilled if we zealously pursue our erotic passions. Look, if the 64-year old, over-sexed Stones’ front man Mick Jagger “can’t get no satisfaction,” then that should tip off all of us that there might not be salvation through sex and there could, just maybe, be something more to life.