"Consequently, we said that Bush duped us by cherry-picking and exaggerating the intelligence. When GOP nitpickers pointed out we had access to the same intelligence, we alternatively denied it and admitted it, but when admitting it, claimed he had pressured intelligence agencies into doctoring their reports. We know that bipartisan and independent investigators determined otherwise. So sue us!
"We also said that when we voted to give President Bush authority to attack Iraq, which authority was unconditional on its face, we understood that he'd keep exhausting his negotiation avenues.
"Actually, our chutzpah even amazes us sometimes. With straight faces we told the people we 'trusted' President Bush would only attack as a last resort, even though we'd made it clear we wouldn't trust him with his own mother. Though we told them Bush had been secretly planning to attack Iraq since before he was born, we asked them to believe we trusted him not to attack Iraq the first chance he got -- with our formal blessing, no less.
"You may recall that we also tried the ploy of demanding we form a stronger 'multilateral' coalition, all the while doing everything we could to sabotage Bush's efforts to build the coalition by arguing against our own participation."
"After all this chaos we've fomented and with the masterful job we've done in undermining the public's support for the war and trust in President Bush, we still don't have a clue what we should do in Iraq other than to keep attacking the president.
"So we demanded a withdrawal timetable and got shot down in the Senate. And in the House few of us even had the courage to vote consistent with our heated rhetoric.
"Not to worry. The 2008 election is three years off, and that gives us at least two more years of mischief before we have to start coming up with some positive ideas of our own, which won't even be necessary if we're able to pressure Bush into the catastrophic mistake of a precipitous withdrawal.
"So cut us some slack. We're just doing what is in the best interests of the country, which is to hoodwink the people into returning us to power."