Chuck Norris

So, bringing a little levity in the midst of a serious run for the GOP nomination and a torn conservative party, Mike entered the fray of this late-night comedy war over his origins. Appearing by satellite, he settled the debate with a bit of his own sardonic humor: "Let's be clear: None of these guys made me. This great nation made me. So vote for me. God bless America, and forget these three idiots." He then finished the week by making a surprise appearance on "The Colbert Report," reaffirming he's still in the race and playing air hockey (with Texas!) to settle the issue.

Mike is one of the most genuinely concerned and capable leaders I've ever met. He's also a unique soul who hasn't lost touch with humanity and that Americans love to laugh -- and sometimes have to remember to do so, even in difficult times. As another commentator noted, "Mike has shown an extraordinary amount of good humor for a national politician."

As I've said on many occasions, I helped light the spark for Mike's campaign, but a spark will go out if it doesn't have a catalyst behind it. Mike's character and message turned that spark into a raging fire. And I challenge anyone who hasn't examined his platform carefully to do so. What awaits is the discovery of a full-fledged conservative.

Incidentally, regarding the three late-night comedians using my life at the center of their scornful and cynical mocking to justify their positions in creating the Huckaboom, I have something lastly to say: I suppose if I believed all those "Chuck Norris Facts" still circulating on the Internet, I'd have to believe the one today that says, "There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live." Ergo (as Conan has said), one rightfully can conclude, it is I (Chuck Norris) who actually made Conan, Colbert and Stewart -- or at least still allow them to live. And just like God might be saying to conservatives even now, I also say to them: Don't make me come down there.


Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris is a columnist and impossible to kill.