Burt Prelutsky

The part that annoys me the most about these lawsuits is that they’ve been filed against the federal government in spite of the fact that during LBJ’s administration the Army Corps of Engineers was ready and eager to repair New Orleans levees until a bunch of tree-hugging busybodies got an injunction to prevent the work being done. As usual, their only concern was that it might have disrupted the plant or animal life in the immediate vicinity. It seems to me they’re the folks who should be sued.

The other case involves a guy in Colorado named Scott A. Gomez. I haven’t been able to track down the name of the lawyer who’s handling his case, but Mr. Gomez, who was incarcerated in Pueblo County Jail on a weapons-related charge, had already broken out once before. Quickly recaptured, he decided to try again in January, 2007. He and a fellow inmate broke through a tile ceiling in the shower, climbed through the opening and made their way through a shaft to the roof. So far, the plan worked like a charm. But when Gomez tried to descend 85 feet to the ground using a makeshift ladder of bed sheets and mattress covers, he fell the final 40 feet, as Wile E. Coyote could have predicted.

His lawsuit, which seeks an unspecified amount of money, contends that the authorities are responsible for his hurting himself because they made it too doggone easy to escape.

The fact of the matter, at least in this court’s opinion, is that they only made the first part easy. Clearly, they made the last 40 feet very hard indeed.

Case dismissed!