Brian McNicoll

But sex is not a necessity. Nothing requires us to do it. If you wish to engage in it, fine. But you pay the bill. You pay for your own abortions – by pill or procedure. You pay for your own contraceptives, your own STD prevention, diagnosis and treatment. And you pay for any dysfunction or other health problems that arise out of it.

This is not about imposing one set of morals or another on the country. This is about establishing a starting point for fiscal restraint – the first lesson of which is “If you can’t afford it, don’t do it.”

One problem is we’ve always treated sex policy – and that’s what this is – differently than all other policy areas. Most of us agree high school students should not engage in sex or smoke, drink or do drugs.

How do we handle this? With smoking, we show pictures of the lungs, throats and mouths of cancer-stricken smokers. We talk of emphysema, heart and lung disease and how tobacco robs us of our youth. With drinking, we play up stories of alcohol abuse leading to death, disease and addiction. With drugs, we show addicts at or near the end of their journeys into miserable death. We talk about the despair, the separation from friends and families, the lies and financial ruin.

But with sex, which is not any more inevitable than the others, we say, “You shouldn’t do it, but you probably will, so here are some things you need to know.” We show them how to do it and how to put a condom on a banana. We discuss “alternate strategies,” such as mutual masturbation and showering together … like those won’t lead to anything further. In some cases, we actually distribute birth control in the schools.

And don’t come at me about the dangers of not doing these things. The human race figured out how to reproduce long before government jumped in to help. And studies consistently have shown that the more we distribute contraceptives, “services” and “information” on sex, the more we reap in STDs, out-of-wedlock births and other bad outcomes.

Now, government is saying since it encourages this damaging behavior, it figures it owes us to pay for the damage.

So why don’t we stop government from encouraging teen sex? How about no more condoms on the banana, no more wink-and-nod sex-ed classes, no more showing people how to do things more than 90 percent of their parents don’t want them to do?

Then, we won’t owe for abortion. For contraceptives. For STD prevention, diagnosis or treatment. There’s a bargain we all can support. 

Brian McNicoll

Brian McNicoll is a conservative columnist and freelance writer based in Alexandria, Va.