4. In 2010, you turned to President Obama after Obamacare passed and on live national television said, "This is a big f---ing deal." Had you ever seen a big f---ing microphone before?
5. If the president had taken your advice to not go after Bin Laden, Bin Laden may still be alive today. What other bizarro foreign policy advice have you given that, thank God, no one took?
6. In 2010, you mistakenly told Irish Prime Minister Brian Cowen that his mother had passed. When you were young, did you ever prank neighbors with dead-mom jokes? (Biden mocked Ryan for quoting his father without really noticing Ryan's father died when he was a teenager.)
7. In June 2006, you said, "You can't go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent." Did you ever try this theory in person? In your judgment, do you think folks could learn how to model their Indian accents after Abu on "The Simpsons"?
8. Then in January of 2007, you said, "You got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy." Since he was the first, what advice would you give to other inarticulate, dumb, dirty and ugly African-Americans such as Clarence Thomas and Oprah Winfrey to help them clean up their act?
9. In October of 2011, when you said that if Republicans didn't pass your jobs bill, "Murder will continue to rise, rape will continue to rise, all crimes will continue to rise." Was that fear mongering or just simply idiotic?
10. In 2008, you said: "Hillary Clinton is as qualified or more qualified than I am to be vice president of the United States of America." Did you ever imagine you could be so right?