Changing minds to -- what? Reality, most of all. The human reality is that of two sexes, formed for each other, nurtured by each other, cooperating, creatively and lovingly, in the great project of moving life forward, generation by generation. The gay union awkwardly plays at imitating what the heterosexual marriage brings off naturally, almost without effort. The gay union, whatever forms of sexual relationship enter into it, is friendship rather than marriage.
A New York Times (of course!) story about gay weddings in California quoted a male Army reservist who was marrying his partner of 10 years. "I can sleep easier now," said Captain Potoczniak, "'because I know that if anything happens to me anywhere in the world, he is my husband now." "Husband"? Meaning Potoczniak is the "wife"? Uh -- no. He's not. There is no "marriage" here. We are reading about friends whose friendship, for reinforcement purposes, doesn't require the warping of society's fundamental institution.
The work of restoring the normal understanding of marriage -- the understanding that "Mr. and Mr." Potoczniak can't get their arms around (and don't care to) -- is work nobody could have imagined, even 10 years ago. Nor is there any early prospect of success. It can't be helped. The view that two men or two women, however honorable, however delightful to talk to, may "marry" -- such a view enthrones the view that all preferences are equal, that nothing is intrinsically right, that no heavenly authority binds humanity. Ninety-nine percent of Americans could believe such stuff, and it still wouldn't be true.