An older and wiser friend, a feminist in many respects, once pointed out to me that, historically, women had great strong friendships with each other that supplied much of their emotional sustenance. If their husbands couldn't always meet their emotional needs, their network of friends typically could, and that worked. It "worked" because that understanding respected what science is now confirming: men and women are built differently. Talk about stating the obvious.

Her belief was that feminists have done women a disservice by convincing us that men should be like us, and if the guys can't emote and connect like we can, then, gosh darn it, they are stunted fools. Her point was that way too many modern relationships have failed because women fruitlessly demanded that their guys be like _ or worse, "replace" _ their women friends.

She's right. Sisters, pay attention.

And husbands, listen up: Apparently one of the best things you can do for your wife is to help her not get so busy that her friendships get pushed to the backburner. If you give her encouragement to build those friendships, or even just more help so she has time for them, you'll be building up her physical and mental health _ along with your own marriage. That connection really has benefits for you!