In July 2003, Kerry uttered this lulu: "The obligation of the United States government is to rapidly internationalize the effort in Iraq, get the target off of American troops, bring other people, particularly Muslim-speaking and Arab-speaking Muslim troops, into the region." I've looked everywhere for classes in speaking Muslim, but I just can't seem to find any. No wonder Muslim speakers are in such high demand! (Note: Associated Press reported this ridiculous gaffe with no comment at all.)
During his nomination speech at the Democratic National Convention, Kerry made the boo-boo of announcing that under his administration, "We will double our special forces to conduct terrorist operations," before correcting himself. If Bush's statement about damaging America was a Freudian slip, why was this far more visible slip simply ignored? Could it be because John Kerry is a liberal? Just a thought.
In August, Kerry delved into football with equally disastrous results. While speaking in Michigan, he noted that "We just came from Bowling Green, and I was smart enough not to pick a choice between the Falcons and the, you know ... all the other teams out there. I just go for Buckeye football, that's where I'm coming out." Except that the Buckeyes are from Ohio State University, and they're bitter rivals with the University of Michigan. Oops. But should this be a surprise coming from a man who holds ears of corn upside down while traveling through Iowa?
Again revealing his knowledge of the common man, last month in Wisconsin, Kerry hilariously referred to the Green Bay Packers football stadium as "Lambert Field." Anyone who knows anything about football knows that the Frozen Tundra is called Lambeau Field. But perhaps Kerry was thinking of his servant Egbert at the time.
Only three gaffes have truly bitten Kerry in his medal-winning posterior. His statement that "I actually did vote for the $87 billion -- before I voted against it" has hurt him. His comment that he would fight a "more sensitive war on terror" has damaged him. And going back a few months, so did his words about foreign leaders backing his candidacy.
Yet Kerry still gets press about being articulate, while Bush is labeled a dumbbell. But if Kerry is articulate, then I speak Episcopalian.
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